Sorry to hear about your health troubles, and the challenges you've been facing in other areas of your life. I'm also too late to comment, since I thought you retired from active posting and stopped checking your blog manually, and this post of course got lost in the ever-moving feed.
I hope the situation in all spheres of your life improves - be they spiritual, relational, physical - and you return as active and vigorous as when we first came to know you.
Be good, man!