There are a few songs out there that really tug at my heart strings, in a way that is very difficult for me to explain with mere words. But no song has the ability to make me cry as fast as "Alfonsina y el mar" does. A Zamba written long before I was born

I remember being a little kid the first time I ever heard Mercedes Sosa sing, and thinking not much about it. In a way, you could say I was dismissive all all music that was not sang in English, something I feel a bit ashamed of if I'm honest.

Many years later, after I had moved out of the house and began experiencing life on my own in Arizona, I felt the need to reconnect with my Hispanic heritage, and thus found myself in search of music that spoke to my soul.

Could not tell you exactly when I first found this song, but I do remember it was a version sang by Israeli musician, a bassist, who paid tribute to this masterpiece in a unique an enchanting way.

What is happening to me?

A tear escaped my usual tough man's facade, as I attempted to focus on his playing, and pretended to care about the technicality of his performance and his virtuosity.

I found myself listening to this song over and over, as if It reminded me of someone I knew, someone who I loved, knowing full well that was completely impossible.

Why does this song make me cry?

It feels like a spell, like it was designed to weaken me into deep introspection. As if the authors had cracked a code, the formula for emotional kryptonite.

After the song had become thematic to my existence, I decided to read the lyrics without music, without the sonic trick that weakened my objective observational skills and disarmed me of composure.

It didn't work... I still cried...

Alfonsina and the Sea

By the hand of all the evenings
In the South, alongside the sea,
She sings a lullaby to her loneliness
Alfonsina, the one who loved the sea.

With her hair of the shadows,
With her dream in the sea foam,
Her voice was like a sad flag
In the wind of the afternoon, oh!

Feelings of love and death
Floated in the song she sang.
The sea that cradles her song
Took her one night, asleep, oh!

Her voice, which the wind carries,
Must be among the waves,
Her lullaby, a murmur,
Alfonsina, the one who loved the sea.

You, who thus joined the immensity
You wanted to merge with the sea,
Hear the murmur, the profound song
That the swells sing, oh!

Walk, Alfonsina, with your solitude
As a star, with the light,
All the seas are asleep
Dreaming on the shore.

Feelings of love and death
Floated in the song she sang.
The sea that cradles her song
Took her one night, asleep, oh!

Her voice, which the wind carries,
Must be among the waves,
Her lullaby, a murmur,
Alfonsina, the one who loved the sea.

Alfonsina y el mar

Por la blanda arena que lame el mar
Su pequeña huella no vuelve más
Un sendero solo de pena y silencio llegó hasta el agua profunda
Un sendero solo de penas mudas llegó hasta la espuma

Sabe Dios qué angustia te acompañó
Qué dolores viejos calló tu voz
Para recostarte arrullada en el canto de las caracolas marinas
La canción que canta en el fondo oscuro del mar, la caracola

Te vas, Alfonsina, con tu soledad
¿Qué poemas nuevos fuíste a buscar?
Una voz antigua de viento y de sal
Te requiebra el alma y la está llevando
Y te vas hacia allá como en sueños
Dormida, Alfonsina, vestida de mar

Cinco sirenitas te llevarán
Por caminos de algas y de coral
Y fosforescentes caballos marinos harán una ronda a tu lado
Y los habitantes del agua van a jugar pronto a tu lado

Bájame la lámpara un poco más
Déjame que duerma nodriza, en paz
Y si llama él no le digas que estoy, dile que Alfonsina no vuelve
Y si llama él no le digas nunca que estoy, di que me he ido

Te vas, Alfonsina, con tu soledad
¿Qué poemas nuevos fuiste a buscar?
Una voz antigua de viento y de sal
Te requiebra el alma y la está llevando
Y te vas hacia allá como en sueños
Dormida, Alfonsina, vestida de mar

Why does this speak to me? Who is Alfonsina?

Keep in mind this song, this poem was written long before I was born and about a person I never met. The inspiration for this song was the death of a poetess.

"Alfonsina y el mar" (lit. 'Alfonsina and the sea') is a zamba composed by Argentine pianist Ariel Ramírez and written by Argentine writer Félix Luna. It was first released as part of Mercedes Sosa's 1969 album Mujeres argentinas. The song is a tribute to Argentine poet Alfonsina Storni, who committed suicide in 1938 by jumping into the sea from a jetty.

Learning about the fate of Alfonsina, her tormented life and how she chose to end it all gave me goosebumps in a way that it's hard to convey with mere words.

Alfonsina had lived a short life, a powerful life, but one filled with pain and suffering. She grew up in terrible poverty, and dove herself into letters to find comfort.

Her suicide, the very act that inspired this poem, and this song, this thing I call a spell, was her way of going out in her terms, not allowing cancer to laugh last.

And then...

After I knew the background of it, the power of the words, the pain that resided in the story, I realized that I had only heard an apprentice warlock sing the spell.

So, knowing full well I will weep again, I listened to Mercedes herself...

She got me

Mercedes never fails to make me cry, no matter how many years pass, how much my life is different now. When I hear her voice, she instantly transports me somewhere I can't describe, and all of the sudden I miss Alfonsina, someone that I never met.

Yes, I realize I sound bananas, but there's one thing you can't accuse me of; dishonesty, at least not on this very point, not about this intimate part of myself I decided to share.

MenO