I think there's the good selfish and bad selfish, bad selfish being your traditional greed and thinking of only yourself, good selfish being a carer taking a break from their dependent so they can breathe, meditate and reflect so that they are not setting themselves on fire to keep others warm.
Ultimately I think category 2 should be the focus, as a lack of category 2 can increase chances of those requiring category 1.
Even those who might be a potential recipient of category 1, they should endure the struggle for at least a little bit, while it might be a painful journey it could still be one worth going down for a life lesson, to realise that we're not going to starve to death if we don't eat that day, sleeping on the floor won't kill us. To care for them is to deprive them of a certain discomfort, and it might be that very discomfort that they need.
It can be a lot easier to prescribe category 1 than tough love, we should be mindful of this.
Well said. I know the times I lived on a boat because my parents lost the house due to financial struggles shaped my life in a good way.