Today I awoke on my daughter's first birthday with memories of being in labor and birthing swirling in my brain. I remember the experience on a cellular level.
Last night as we sat at dinner we remembered my rushes beginning for real at around 6pm, after a day of shitting my brains out - the result of castor oil to induce labor, since my baby was 2 weeks over cooked. The Englishman (father of my daughter, my beloved) had been building a duck umbrella to pass the time, and we took an outdoor shower and counted contractions with an app - it is the 21st century, afterall!
Our midwife arrived at around 11pm last night, a year ago. I was 8 cm dilated. We all thought she would be born that night. But she wasn't. She held on until 4:45pm today, one year ago, today.
My brother made us hamburgers for dinner. I ate some yogurt and fruit. All of this came back up a few hours later. My last supper. All I would eat for the next 24 hours would be frozen strawberries, spoonfuls of honey, and water. And then, finally, as I was narcoleptic, I took a nap and my beloved brought me the miso soup & chicken broth that revitalized all my righteous woman goddess chi to kick in, full force, and enable me to summon my higher self --- my body felt it could not go on, so it was my spirit and my beloved's spirit that got Eve born 1 hour later. She took her first breath about 150 feet from where I took mine here at Lunasi in a natural home birth. Thank you miso, thank you chicken broth, and thanks to the energy being sent to me and my baby from all around. I now have a 1 year old little girl who is so splendid.
The last year has been the biggest ... how to even say! Its been the BIGGEST!!!!! The DAYS are LONG, the YEAR has been SHORT. Sleep has been LITTLE (for me), MUCH (For Eve), and my daughter has gotten SO BIG! She's a chirping, slobbering, almost walking, signing, laughing, eating, drinking, sleeping, delight-filled Burden of Joy! Eve Aurora Exploradora. Eve Aurorasaurus. Squirrelkins. Grumblina. You have stolen the hearts of your folks and many more.
Today I woke up at 5:30, fed you, put you down for a nap, then took the dog for a run. I gathered you a bouquet of birthday flowers. Here they are, for you, my sweet baby, on your birthday. Thanks for choosing me as your mom.
Love,
Lily
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Beautiful villa and flower
by @fahrullah