My mother is hungry." The sentence brought him out of his shackles to intervene in a state of intense tension that intensified as the boy repeated the sentence; his eyes narrowed and their cheeks reddened, His breathing was noticeably disturbed. He did not know whether the boy was repeating the same sentence dozens of times or was it repeated in his ears on her own. He pulled out his body from the sofa after his fury grew and Soba walked towards him with the boy holding on to his arm. He was so angry he almost had a smell that smelled miles away. "If I was hungry, go to the kitchen and eat whatever you want." His wife rushed towards them, hugging the boy while asking her husband what was happening. He turned to her but he did not hear what she was saying .. about looking towards the boy to find himself holding his arm hard enough to break it. I gave it up quickly, as though he were denying what he had just done. He took two steps backwards. He shifted his gaze between them. He tried to apologize, but that damned sentence returned to his head again
have to come back, do you understand?" He frowned and then said sadly: "Believe me, my son, you do not know the meaning of hunger!" Then he headed for the office room.
The boy went on with astonishment that was only matched by the pain of his arm. He looked at his mother with his eyes soaked with tears to hug him more forcefully.
"There are many who suffer deprivation, poverty and hunger, and your father is working hard to provide us with a decent life so that we will not be them. When you grow up you will understand your father's behavior," his mother said in an attempt to explain what happened. He seemed unconvinced about what you said and so was the boy, but he loved to believe what she said, he loved his father so much.
The mother managed somehow to calm the atmosphere there, but behind the door of the office, the atmosphere was very charged and the storm that calmed out of the office just started inside!
He closed the door with the key as he usually does in such a situation. He leaned his head against the door and took a deep breath, trying to forget what had just happened. He looked around the spacious office with expensive furniture and a library full of hundreds of books. He thought reading one might insult him a little, but when he reached the middle of the room he was prepared to leave the shelves and take him in the shape of a circle around him. Madly: "Mom, I'm hungry ... Mom, I'm hungry" .. It looked like a strange satanic weather or visited a special kind.
He held his head uncomprehending to what was happening. Try to expel those delusions from him .. Close his eyes but to no avail. Then the episode turned into a whirlpool swallowed him to receive it to another place.
He changed his vocabulary from a lavish office to a filthy room in a modest house, with a miserable woman, in her mid-30s and a child of only seven.
"My mother is hungry, my mother is hungry," the child screams, but she does not move a finger at all. After several attempts, he stifles his shield and yells at him with artificial cruelty: "What do you want me to do if you feel hungry?" "There's no food in the house!"
The child hits the ground with his feet, muttering, "But I am very hungry"
Then she gives her a helping hand, and with a mixture of anger and bitterness she answers: "I am so!"
That woman was his mother and he was that child. It seemed that all those feelings of his day had returned to him. In one corner of his body, hugging his body, how much he would have liked if his mother had hugged him then. He crushed his damned memory that brought him back four decades back!
It is true that the days smiled after him for years, but his memory certainly does not know how to smile. Swallowing it as if it were a black hole .. Black in every sense of the word!
The mad-tongued books continue to take him back to another place of his memory.
Remember meals. Their number varied from day to day; there were three meals in the days of prosperity that were not frequent, and the number was reduced to two meals in normal days. In difficult times, however, the number was often zero, leaving hunger to extend its absolute sovereignty over their empty stomachs.
He was his four brothers and his parents were eating all the food and the same dish, not to preserve the spirit of the family but because the meal could not bear the division.
Before the dish was placed on the table they were preparing him well. Washing hands and preparing dishes, knives and knives were not part of the preparations, but the latter were limited to maintaining the fitness of the jaws and the right hand, which helps to eat as much food as possible as fast as possible!
Once the mother puts the dish until the brothers are glued to each other with a look they did not agree on its meaning before but everyone knows it well. It was really like a fight!
He was not able to keep up with his brothers in their terrible speed of eating so he usually got the least share. He wished then if he was a regular animal so he did not have to waste his time chewing!
The parents were satisfied with a few things, allowing their children to fill the gap. The mother explained this by following a diet to lose weight and the fact that their father often had to eat in advance with his friends. No one was really convinced that they said they loved him. They do not have the luxury of looking for the truth because the voice of hunger is stronger than everything else.
A cold tear falls from his eyes in the details of the anniversary, bringing him back to the ground. He sends his hands to his jacket pocket, looking for a cigarette. He accidentally drops a packet of mint gum. He remembers how he used to snatch the gum - which women used to glue down the table or chair after finishing - and then wash it and chew it again. The anniversary evoked disgust, so he adjusted his body to vomit but nothing came out of his mouth. He had not eaten anything for more than two days. He has long been accustomed to this and no longer needs food until his wife no longer asks him about it.
Hit his head with his fist, desperately trying to keep that anniversary from his head. He wanted to light the cigarette, but his memory stopped again, bringing him back to where he had been chasing cigarettes from the ground to use them again.
Hit his head with his hands this time with greater force but to no avail.
In a desperate attempt to evade his past, he reminds himself of what has become of him now, with his beautiful wife and wonderful child, with his beautiful house and spacious apartment in the center of the city and his farm, with his bank records, his job, his rich friends and powerful acquaintances who were born and in their mouths spoons of gold. He was born and had nothing but the word hunger!
He convinced himself that it was a fleeting fit as its predecessors, and gathered its forces toward the door. But his memory was to let him slip this time. Attacked him violently and could not resist ..
He remembers himself spending hours doing homework for his classmates in exchange for a few coins he added to his brothers' help to buy some food.
He remembers the age he lost because of a punch from his older brother because he took possession of the latter's bread.
He remembers a day when he and his brothers found food in the house but a few dry bread like rock. Then one of them took it and crushed it in the muzzle and gave it to them, saying with a smile that had no color: all that is good for chewing is edible!
He remembers the sound of his empty stomach that kept him from sleeping at night.
Remember that he did not know the meaning of satiety even once, he was eating only to become less hungry!
He remembered all the details and moved among the deepest pits of his memory to him that was worse than hell.
He went back to lie in the corner, giving in to bitter weeping, and hitting the back of his head against the wall as his crying grew louder and lost his memory.
He hears a knock on the door of the office. He wants to be reassured by his wife as usual. " Are you fine?" Ask him anxiously.
He wants to answer her that he is not well, to take advantage of her to save him from his memory, but he could not. It seems to him that things this time out of control. Even when he wanted to open the door to her father, his body would only go toward the office; he sat involuntarily on the chair, opened one hand and inserted a drawer and a sheet of paper. He tried to write to relax but could not .. Finally two words on the paper and gave the pen in defeat.
In the meantime, his anxious wife asked the servants to help open the door of the room after receiving no answer. Before they reached the door, a strong voice came out from behind him. There was a moment of terrible silence after him.
They hurried to break the door, to find his body lying on his desk, next to his head a spot of blood loaf of bread and a paper that read: "My memory has killed me!"
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Good read!
Thank you my friend