Crestfallen Under the Mistletoe : Poetry Series (I WONDER)

melancholy engulfs me, until it suffocates me with a river of tears.

               I Wonder

I wonder,
I wonder why you were utterly nonchalant about letting me go.
When I said the words that inevitably stabbed all the tremendous melancholies in your heart,
The words that I thought would end the pain of the past.

I knew within the depths of my cold heart
That never in a million stars in the sky,
Would I ever mean those harsh words.

I let out a sigh,
Suddenly engulfed with the mixed feelings of the bitter yesterday
That i know will be forever kept in a box of reminiscence.

I remembered them all
In an abrupt moment
Of our last chapter
That will inevitably turn into a melancholic tomorrow for me.

I guess,
Even if tomorrow never comes,
I promise you that I'll never fail to show that I only care for you.
But this time,
It is time for me to step back and give way.

However,
I will always remember the only question you asked that I refused to answer
I'm sorry.
Perhaps, it was because I already found serendipity within what my worth actually was.
I will learn on how to bottle up my own blustering winds.