Groggy

in #poetry8 years ago (edited)

History both weighs down and uplifts,

The young ones who are awakening.

We pull ourselves up by the fingertips

and glance over the edge of History.

Here we meet reality

With ancient, new eyes

and look around in confusion.

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Nice! :) in the middle sentence there is one "who" too many?

Last line would sound better without the word "us" in it, in my opinion.

thanks for the feedback :)

this is so beautiful (tear-face)

Thank you for the nice words :) I write to touch people and this comment makes me want to write more poetry.