I fooled everyone I was someone I’m not
I kept acting like a Hollywood star
But the worst thing is
I even fooled myself
Now I’m searching for the core of myself
Who was I before I became someone I thought they would like?
Before I forced myself to play an extrovert
I just didn’t want to seem boring and nerdy
I didn’t know I sold my soul
I wasn’t aware of the price I had to pay
I tried, oh, how I tried
To become someone they would like
But did I like myself?
Changing like a chameleon
I forgot who I really am
I’m more an introvert than an extrovert
I’m what they would stereotype as an old soul
I’m really deep but I’ve sometimes been shallow to survive
I had to go to the surface to breathe
Otherwise I would die at the bottom of the deep ocean
I’m a strange blend of being nerdy and cool at the same time
What is characteristic for me is contrasts, black or white
I love crazy mixes of colors, of different styles
In my core I’m what they would call a sensitive artist
I’m an intelligent woman who got lost in a place where I didn’t belong
I just need to find my arena, my crowd
People that will love and appreciate me for who I really am
Somewhere I belong, and among people where I don’t need to act
I’ve been searching for myself in strange and dangerous places
But I’ve never felt like I fully fit in, maybe I don’t even need to
Maybe I just need people around me that accept and appreciate me for who I am
People who are blessing me, not cursing me
Don’t try to fit in all the time, be yourself and you will find the right people
Because, I mean, how can they find you if you always wear a mask?
I like the way this piece flowed through the contemplative thoughts of the narrator. To me, it seemed to reflect the way thoughts sort of lead in to each other whether strongly related or not. Good Write.
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