A Poem I Wrote Over a Year Ago

In August 2016 I wrote this poem. The inspiration came to me when I was feeling disconnected. I hope you like it :)

OUTSIDE
I’d pressed my face to the window many times
Wondering what it would be like
To be inside.

I would watch with envy and longing
To know
The taste of
The smell of
The feel of
What it would like to be
Inside.

Outside I felt cold
Wet
Abandoned.

But if I was inside, I thought,
I could feel
Wanted
Loved
And cared for.

I had all these grand ideas
Of how great
My life would be
If I could only be
Inside.

And the longer I stood
Outside
The deeper I felt
My aching
My longing
My sadness
To be inside.

Looking through the window
That separated me
From my yearning,
My feelings grew,
Until
I saw my reflection in the glass.

Then it dawned on me.

I wasn’t just outside this window,
This building,
This establishment.

I was outside myself.

And I was only outside
Of me
Because
I’d chosen to be.

And as this realization
Began to swell,
I felt
A tickle in my gut.

And all I could do
Was laugh.

And I laughed
And laughed
And laughed

And I came to see
That the only inside
That mattered to be,
That really mattered to be,
Was
Inside me.

August 2, 2016 11:45 AM PDT