How to fit in? How can I know what piece of puzzle I have to play? Could it be that what I am now is the piece that I should play? If hardship and sacrifice is the negative flow, then we complacency and comfort is enough?
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I fear you ask me questions only you can answer. First ask what you struggle for, is it for a positive effect in the end or a negative one? You could hammer in one piece to fit with another by brute force alone, but the picture would not be comprehensible. To force one's fitting in with social groups or with people is the same thing. The phrase of flogging a dead horse is one that when we try hard to fit in but cannot, no matter how hard we flog ourselves or punish others; in my experience if it doesn't fit then it doesn't fit.
For me it's not about "comfort" ease, by more procedural ease. If you try to drive uphill in the wrong gear then the car will labour to the point of stalling. But get it into the right gear and then you start climbing. It's not easy to say which gear is the absolute best for the process, but once you find it then it just works. I find that when we try to fit into something that's everything we are not, it's because deep down we dislike everything we are.
I'd like to think I'm struggling for a positive one but lots of factors come into to play especially my what my family will think that what I want is lost in the process because I have to put them first. Does that make sense? Also, I know their concern is for me not to get hurt in the end or in the process. Must I head on to experience and see the outcome of things, to see if it is for me or not? Or heed their advice? Should I let fate or God take matters into play? Those are the kinds of questions I constantly ask.
That makes perfect sense :-) We have those who care for us and those we care for, we cannot turn our backs on that. What I would maybe suggest is to think of life as a constantly unfolding thing, that where you are now is not necessarily your end destination; to perhaps take it a bit easier on yourself. When I think of my own experiences, I came to see that the places I fit the most were not always ones that I necessarily wanted to fit in, but only because I was not happy in myself, that it was only when I accepted myself that these places became my home. There are times when we can be the obstacle to our own procedural ease ;-)
Besides, I have come to think that we cannot avoid finding our place, it gravitates to us as we to it. When you look aroud the world at how many groups who celebrate things like Star Trek, Star Wars, Harry Potter for example. Their passion for the story brings them together in groups, to conventions. People who like sports or muisc or books are the same, they tend to find similar minded people. I supose what I'm saying here is that rather than look to other people and ask if we can fit them, we can look to ourselves, understand who we are and what we like and what we stand for. If we know where we fit in ourselves then we can have an idea what bigger picture we are part of.
Thanks! This certainly helps to think clearer. It also reassures me to not to think of it as a burden to rather be more accepting of what IS.
No problem :-) Much I find is about letting our natural energy find it's natural flow without our constant interruption ;-) Don't worry, I'm sure you will get there.