And There Will Be No More Pain [@mindhunter POEM ORIGINAL*]

in #poetry8 years ago (edited)

Pain strikes through my body

Like lighting strikes a tree

Breathe in, breathe out

The world fading fast

A picture is painted, the colours are bold

One for each season of life I suppose

Staggering breathe, then cough

Like when I fall asleep

Last breath

Heart slows to a stop

Nothing is smell

Nothing is sight

No more pain

Everything is so cold

Gone...


*Poem inspired by a quote from Stratovarius (We Are Magic)

@mindhunter

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Excellent pacing @mindhunter

Pacing & Rhythm: 7/10 / Imagery: 4/10 / Overall: 5/10 ;)

(never let it be said that I don't take a dose of my own critical medicine!)

Dark photo. Dark poem.

Surely there is hope in that title if you want there to be hope?? ;)

.............................................................................as the soul floats off into the ether........................................................................................................................

.....................................................

Your poetry really surprises me @mindhunter

Me too! I don't know where it comes from??

Nice poem completion going on there!

Oh! I do know where it all comes from....the subconscious mind :)

I think the truth lies in a price below $0.30!

Man! That is some serious death by flagging?! Why??