Wow, that's a lot. I started reading this a few days ago and realized that I need more bandwidth to focus on it. I'm really sorry that you're going through that. You don't have to be a doormat or a punching bag for anyone. It seems that when it rains, it pours, and you've had a lot of rain recently.
I don't really have any words to make it better, except "don't give up." As long as you don't give up, you're winning. Sometimes that's all we can do, and it counts as winning, even if it doesn't feel like it.
It's often not easy to do the right thing, but it's worth it for the peace of mind at night. Good for you for choosing to try to fix things.
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