What have we become?
Silent shadows standing,Waiting
for something to be,For
prayers to become miracles,For
some sort of pat
On our shoulders saying;
Match on, it's going to be fine?
But we do not really know
What it is we seek,
Or who we truly are, do we?This air leaves us breathless
As we fall ,
Like broken angels
Shimmering like a mirage,
Like something unsure
Of its own existence ,
Like a slowly descending leaf
That has lost itself
In the wind for too long
And doesn't know the way
Back home.do not know
The name for pain
So we call it father,
Husband, boyfriend and friend.
We have forgotten how
To remember scars ,
So we have named themLove
bites, scratches,And
feverish kisses.
We cannot name depression,
So we call him meditation,Alone
time, tiredness, rest.In this place,
Where truth is a lost cry,
Crushed throat suffocatingAround the brutal hands of need,
How do we rise ?
How do we find ourselves,Remember
our names
And the names of things?
For we have forgotten even
Our own namesAnd all we remember is
You.This is my second time experimenting with the poem within a poem style. If you follow poetrymano on instagram you will know of the redacted style of creating poetry. I know it has more formal name, this style, but it is 4:44am in the morning and it is cold. Absolutely not a conducive environment to start thinking of the name of a writing style and I absolutely detest using google to find stuff like this.
Anyway, the style involves redacting words and sentences from a text and in that manner create new sentences and meaning. Redaction on its own, is popular among government ran security agencies who think certain information are not suitable for public consumption and as a result, they tend to black out certain phrases, sentences, paragraphs and words from documents which they consider sensitive.
Since I could not redact words here, I decided to create the experience and at the same time give us a poem within another poem. I think the visual experience is awesome and the possibilities for deriving meaning is endless. The poet can play with words and meaning in more ways with this technique. I will call this technique the Steemwarping technique for the sake of fun. 😂
I first used this technique in an old poetry post, MY NIGHTMARE. In this poetry piece, I focused more on creating images with markdown and words but you will still see a little of the steemwarping technique.
To achieve the steemwarping technique, I made use of several markdown codes. You can see it from the screenshots below. Take notes of the codes and the spacing. This is very important.
If you miss a single code, something will go wrong and sometimes it won't be something you'd be quick to identify, so go through the editing again and again until you are sure.
It may seem to be too much trouble but the end result is worth it and it's poetry. Well that is how I create my steemwarping technique.
What unique thing have you created with markdown codes?
Screenshots are shots of my steemit editor taken with my phone, Infinix Hot5 Lite.
Thank you @thekittygirl. I have actually seen some poetry created by redacting newspaper editorials, textbooks, magazine, etc. I just could not do it here on steemit.
I hope to see more innovative use of markdown editing. Thanks for having me up on PYPT
This is sort of like blackout poetry only it's the words that are sort of blacked out. It's amazing how the bold words read on their own.
we
Remember
names
forgotten
names
Is my especial favorite. Good job, bro!
Cheer,
Ras.
Yeah, you noticed? That was the plan, to have a poem within a poem. Thanks for stopping by. Peace
really wonderful .., your poetry is very good to read .., especially dikalimat
"What would we be?
The silent shadow stands,
Waiting for something to happen,
A prayer to be a miracle,
For some kind of pat
On our shoulders said;
Matches, will it be okay?
But we do not really know
What we are looking for,
Or who we really are, "
my respect for you
Hello! I find your post valuable for the wafrica community! Thanks for the great post! @wafrica is now following you! ALWAYs follow @wafrica and use the wafrica tag!
What creativity do you have ... congratulations!
The immeasurable one yeah...
😂 thanks @dorth.
Hi warpedpoetic,
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Unique and always interesting reading from you. So much creativity in your art. Learning closely
Marvelous! Shiver an my spine! I'm impressed with your talent!
Thank you @ravijojla