Fly Me to the Moon or Bust!
(Steps onto Soap Box)
Have we been to the moon or have we not? On one hand there is NASA and the American government saying that they have “been there, done that”. Then there are the masses of people whom say that NASA never ever made it, and they have the body of evidence to prove it. So who is right?!
Ding Ding round one, in the left corner is NASA and the USA Government whom swear black and blue they touched Terra Moonus more times than Pewee Herman touched himself. Yet in the same breath they have made it clear that they will never ever go back. As if spending no less than the combined time of three weeks at 7 site no bigger than the size of a ten acre farm, costing Billions of dollars and claim that it was more than enough to scientifically say “It’s Fucking Cold and Dry up There!”
But here is the crunch, NASA started the Space Shuttle program to be a returnable vehicle to go TO the Moon and return at costs less than the original Apollo missions. After 30+ years of fucking around trying to get the little shits to go higher than low orbit, have they ever thought of going back, with the advancements of the Shuttle experiments and newer, ever changing technology.
NO. A big fat Nope because, they have lost the technology to get to the moon…..WTF!!!!! What has happened! Did somehow all this space fairing turn the scientist into stupid blobs, what the fuck have you been experimenting on, advancements ON that knowledge of making the moon trip faster and safer or stuffing around trying to find ways to wast Billions of dollars so they can keep their jobs.
December 1972 was not only the very last time we went to the moon but also the very last time a maned mission left earths orbit, that is a staggering 46 years! 46 years of doing what, what the fuck have NASA and USA been doing?! Lets put this into perspective, the first Intercontinental ballistic missile was launched in November 1957 (By CCCP), the first (supposed) landing on the moon (by USA) was in 1969, a mere 12 years later, 12 years! How much advancement should we have done in 46 year if, with far less technology man shot a missile into the air then managed to (supposedly) walk on the moon!
But that is the real question, did the USA really make it to the moon or did they pull off the biggest fraud in history just to crush the spirit of the CCCP! From April 1961 through to December 1968 both the CCCP and the USA were only doing manned missions inside earth’s orbit, all other space activity was done by satellites and both USA and CCCP were testing ship to ship transferring (Russia even tested a remote ship to ship docking). Suddenly USA made the first orbit of the moon despite being behind the tech ball with the CCCP on the cusp of doing the first none earth orbit (Not to the moon but not within the earths orbit).
This was huge and out of left field because neither the CCCP nor the USA tested human non-orbital flight. Most had been remote or mostly animals were used, with not very good signs (Most animals were KFC by the time they got back to earth from the high radiation). So how did the USA suddenly get men from earth to the moon without them coming back looking like Spicy Chicken Wings?! Then 6 months later USA pulls another rabbit out of their arse, landing men on the moon again while Russia and the rest of the science community are still scratching their heads over the first trick of eluding the killer radiation!
And the USA’s secret, Aluminium foil, not just any supa dupa scientific foil but humble kitchen foil, the same one that stops aliens from reading your brain waves, right there in the kitchen fucking draw!! Then to shoot an untested, manned LEM, back into space with nothing but warm wishes for those aboard and it is a success first time, WOW. There is a first time for everything, seeing that almost everything else up to now failed three or four times (with some loss of life)!
Now you know why there is a huge faction of people that do believe that USA did not reach the moon. The fairy tales are just so unbelievable, but so is the trash that is coming from the doubters. How do we know that they too are not spinning bull and photo shopping film to prove their point. I mean come on, the USA did make some effort, after all they hired Stanley Kubrick, how could they go wrong!
But let me throw at you a third tangible theory, what if USA and CCCP both were successful in sending men to and around the moon but it was a one way ticket, a suicide mission but the astronauts were not told. Now the good old CCCP will never admit to their failures and we do know countless individuals lost their lives for Mother Russia in the space race. But what if USA and NASA had two sets of Astronauts, one team, the dream team, made for tv, books and PR and the second team who actually went up to land on or go around the moon, do the actual leg work, all the while dying from radiation poisoning and suddenly find out that LEM stands for Lemon!
They take their chances, because by now they realise that all that barfing is not because of the chicken salad they had the night before. Hit the big red button and either one of two things happens 1) the LEM launches but, dose not reach altitude and comes back down several miles away and explodes on impact, making the LEM look like every other impact creator on a moon full of impact creators, or 2) the LEM actually got off the ground but because the astronauts were so well cooked, that NASA decided to shoot them off into space, far away from the public’s eyes because even they had to admit, failure is not good PR.
Yes there is a moon buggy and the base of a LEM on the moon, but what if that was not the monument of USA victory, but the epitaph of the brave individuals who sacrificed their lives to make a lie look real.
(Steps off Soap Box)