Alright guys, I have to get something off of my chest.
About a week ago I voiced my opinion about who should be able to say the "N" word to a close friend of mine. She holds the view that if you aren't black, then you shouldn't be able to say the "N" word. This isn't a believe that is uncommon. She also holds the view that you shouldn't say the "N" word if you are non-black, under ANY circumstance. Singing along with the lyrics of a song was brought up as an example. I basically asked, "Well, why?". I said that obviously I was against saying the "N" word at someone, meaning to cause them harm. But why should I be against these non-harmful ways of using the word (like in music)? And why is it that only a certain group of people are shamed for using this word in these non-harmful ways?
Now, this was a friend I had all throughout high school, and my two years of college. And what happened? She blocked me, for inquiring about her view, no less. I was honestly heartbroken. I felt I didn't do anything to deserve this! And I didn't! I was very polite in my response, even letting her know that I wouldn't personally use the word around her, because it upsets her, and I respect that.
Alright, so this is where it gets strange. She told me she didn't care about my opinion, then proceeded to block me. But I know that if it was a black person voicing this opinion, she would have handled it differently. It may seem inconsequential, but she was being racist, by treating me and my opinion with less respect than she would have if I were black.
Two super important lessons to take home from this:
Don't use language to hurt people. They don't deserve it, and neither do you.
Don't get upset and block long time friends. They don't deserve it, and neither do you.
Just be nice to each other okay? And don't call each other the "N" word.
You were brave to make this post, especially as you felt the subject had already cost you a friend. However, your friend was/is only following the pack and does not have the courage to think for herself.
She obviously fears sticking out like a sore thumb, and her instincts warn her you might pose a danger if things come to a head, as the entire population of our planet divides itself into those who believe in logic and reason and the benefits of debate, and those who think that only emotion has right on its side, even when our commonsense tells us it is wrong.
Yeah, sometimes it can be tough for people to not be emotionally attached to their positions. I try my best not to get so attached!