An Open Letter to Mr. Donald J. Trump | Part One

[youngjae]

Pre-Writing Disclaimer: as the title indicates, this is a political post. It is intended as satire, but also as a semi-serious critique of the President of the United States. If you find the lack of respect used in this writing offensive, I'm sorry it hurts your feelings, but I can assure you the disrespect was directed at the man and not the office. I will not withdraw the lack of respect I hold for this dispicable individual.

Mr Trump,

It astounds me how you have made it this far on the fumes of your own reputation. In fact, I'm quite shocked by how well you have pruned and maintained your brand. To many you are the image of wealth and success, yet to others (and these are the loud ones) you are nothing but a liar and shameful excuse for a human being. I regret to inform you that I am one of the latter.

If it has been said once, it's been said a thousand times, sir, yet I must once again inform you: Mexicans are NOT all rapists. Now I know some of the Orange Lives Matter crew will rush in to point out that your full statement finished with the phrase "...and some, I assume, are good people." However the manor in which the words were uttered is just as much a part of the meaning as the statement itself, and, my friend, this too does not bode well for you. It was clear in your intonation that this statement was a mere afterthought, said dismissively, almost to cover your bases for the inevitable backlash that has ensued in the months since. By the time this was stated, the words fell on deaf ears (A note to Donny: This is what we refer to as a figure of speech, I am not speaking of any actual deaf people who, lord have mercy, may be a part of your entourage.)

And Donald, your wall, we must talk about this as well. Your little friend Seanie has confused us all over whether you consider the new fences that he fawned over in his briefing as The Wall or just a wall.

Here is the briefing, in case you forgot, Donny.

He claims this is just a down payment on more to come, but I want to hear from the horses mouth, Are these fences your wall, or are they just temporary precautions? I only ask this because if this is, in fact, The Wall, I can deal with this-- our budget can deal with this. On the other hand, your "Beautiful Trump Wall" may be a little harder on our nation's budget. I'm happy to pay for useful things, but I don't have money for big toys like your Wall.

Alright, Donny, that's all the time I have for you today, I will be writing you more in the future on other points of contention. Until then...

Regards,
@youngjae