I don't think I ever really understood what many Moms tried to tell me about Infant Sleep and Sleep Training before having my own child. The whole "enjoy your sleep now" and "sleep when the baby sleeps" advices became annoying towards the end of my pregnancy. But I will be honest and say that I was quite overwhelmed when our son was born and sleep deprivation became reality.
I suddenly found myself helplessly trying to soothe and calm my crying baby, figuring out how to get information without having to read 300 pages of a book and at the same time doing my best to take care of myself. A book that was recommended to me was Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth, M.D., which I still use today! There are many different sleep scenarios that you can easily relate to in this book. And so so much new information about the importance of infant and child sleep!!
Sleep is important during the first few years of our children's lives as it directly impacts their development (both mental and physical), their growth (muscle building, nervous tissue growth and repair) and their hormone production. Getting enough rest will result in a happy and alert child with a healthy amount of energy.
My 3 week old newborn baby who loved to sleep on me.
Newborn babies (0-3 months) are still in a "sleepy mode" after birth and aren't really aware that they have left Mommy's womb. All these big changes are overwhelming and unknown to them. They are used to sleeping A LOT (from the time in the womb) and aren't able to stay awake for too long (45-60mins max). You'll also notice that they'll be more awake at night and less during the day. It's important to learn their cues and help them fall asleep before they become too overtired. When the baby gets overtired, the body is physically so tired and stressed that it starts producing stress hormones (cortisol and adrenalin) to help baby stay awake, which makes it even harder for them to calm down and sleep. This cycle of overtiredness will just get worse and make so much more difficult for them to relax.
Tired and Sleepy Signs/Cues to watch out for:
- rubbing of the face, ears and eyes
- yawning
- fussiness that might end up in crying
- disinterest in any type of stimulation
- gets wound up and hyperactive
How you can help your baby get on a good sleep pattern and get enough rest:
First you will want to try to calm the baby down - move to a quiet, dark or dimmed room with no stimulation. Often a white noise machine will help create a familiar environment as well (that's how it sounds like in the womb). If a baby cannot calm down, he or she will not be able to get sleep.
- hold and rock your baby
- bottle feed or nurse your baby
- sing soft lullabies or hum a melody
- swaddling (to keep them snug like in the womb)
I also recommend reading The Happiest Baby on the Block by Harvey Karp, M.D. to get familiar with the 5 S's.
The first 3 months are tough on Mom because while she is still recovering from childbirth, she is also dealing with sleep deprivation and figuring out the newborn baby in her life. Don't give it! It gets easier after that, because around 3-4 months, your baby's sleep pattern will take a huge turn and start to normalize. Your baby will sleep more at night and will be more awake during the day.
I'll soon post about getting into a solid routine, sleep training and what sleep disruptions to be aware of.
Also check out my previous post on Infant Schedules, Bedtime and Naptime Routines!
xTanya
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Thank you for this guide. I never thought about the baby wanting to sleep the same pattern as in the womb ie. More during the day and less at night. I will be sure to make the most of day time naps when my baby comes!
This is when I now also tell moms-to-be to sleep when the baby sleeps :D I didn't for the first 4 weeks and it took away all my energy. The housework can wait, food can be ordered for delivery and laundry can be outsourced. If friends and family want to help - tell them to get you a meal train ;-) Sleep when your baby sleeps and take good care of yourself too. And if you must, give the baby to someone else to hold for a little while and give them something that smells like you (shirt, scarf, sweater) and they will be fine. xo
Thank you! X
To be a good mother is a great virtue
This is the kindest thing anyone has said to me in such a long time! Thank you!!!!!
Oh yes it's always tough at first and also watch out for signs of post partum depression such as withdrawing and losing interest in the baby and in life in general. Lack of sleep can increase the risk of it. I had it and it was awful. However babies grow get older and your sleep will be back, and they get their nights and days straightened out.
So sorry you had to deal with PPD. Glad you caught it and got past it. It's definitely something women need to talk about, because it happens way more often than you know. Even though I did not experience post-partum depression, I have had episodes of ante-partum anxiety! I'll definitely write about that at some point. xo
I'm sorry to hear that you suffered as well! None of it is easy and depression in general needs to be talked about more often than it is. In fact my blog post tomorrow will be about my current struggles with depression.