This is a very insightful, straight-forward comment @nigtroy!
You have raised a very important point here: the comparison that others place us in. But, I believe that in such cases, once again, self-understanding plays an important part in these cases as much as communicating them to others... this is a sort of discussion which I believe it is very important to have in the household to avoid this sort of situation.
Thank you for this great comment!
Best :)