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RE: The pain of international recipes

in #rant7 years ago

Your butter doesn't come in sticks? How does it arrive? In tubs? baggies? messenger bags?

Our butter is pooped out by the butter-cow, which has been bred to have a perfectly square anus, and then trained and disciplined until it has the self control to pinch off perfect four ounce cubes into the paws of a waiting origami-wax-papering gibbon.

Clearly you Finns have a bit to learn about dairy.

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Nope. Our cows have huge rectums and they give butter in this form:

It's typically 500g a piece, so you can imagine the work they are going through.

I like big butters and I can not lie
You dairy farmers can't deny
When a heifer pushes hard for a kilogram of lard
Leaves a square thing on the shelf
You get hungry...

INSPIRATION