Definition of Contemporary Conflict:
In contrast to the traditional conflict of values, the contemporary conflict is distinguished by these features: (1) extensiveness; (2) complicatedness; (3) profoundness; and (4) continuousness.
side note: Consequently, everything listed below are also all part of building personal resilience.
Contemporary conflict is almost a verbal contradiction. To think that just because something is causing conflict today doesn't mean that it hasn't caused conflict in the past. There are many great books written on conflict and conflict resolution but it is not as easy as reading a book and applying the knowledge. Contemporary conflict resolution can have many faces and many solutions depending on some factors such as extensiveness, complicatedness, profoundness, and continuousness. Other factors that can play a crucial part in conflict resolution would be atmosphere of the group, social and economic norms, biases, cultural norms, socioeconomic, internal conflict, and other various reasons. My study is from my own organization that is going through many changes at many different level, some of which are not proliferated across the spectrum in our organization.
1. Understand the culture and dynamics of conflict
(http://www.enotes.com/topic/Old_boy_network)
(http://www.enotes.com/topic/Cronyism)
To be able to understand the culture and dynamics one has to remove themselves from the mono social patterns there are used to in everyday life and place themselves in a cross-cultural environment that has roots in hierarchy and cronyism. This behavior has been dated back to the 1800's and has been seen throughout society since. Cronyism is the derivative of the current "crony" or friend. One of the main reasons for societal conflict today can be attributed to this phenomenon. The social environment that I work in is very much based off cronyism, or the good ol' boy network, where getting things done requires one to be part of the "clique".
2. Listen empathetically and responsively
Listening empathetically within cronyism is a very difficult task. Not only does one have to be empathetic to the overall success but also to their crony. Once the boundaries are crossed there is a good chance that certain tasks will not get accomplished in the work environment. It is like being a servant to many masters. The truth of the matter is that being true to yourself and listening with unbiased empathy will create the optimal environment for clarity.
3. Search beneath the surface for hidden meanings
(http://www.mediate.com/articles/cloke2.cfm)
Beneath the surface is a hidden agenda mixed with the flavor of friendships past. In the article was one place near the end that caught my eye and really captured the true meaning of not only looking beneath the surface but also being able to look beyond what's beneath. There was a woman who worked in an office environment for a few years. She never really had problems but lately she was late and gone all the time. The mediators came in and assessed the situation. The end result was that she had become addicted to drugs and they were in control of her life. The boss wanted to fire her but the mediator stepped in to find out what the root of the problem was. They all agreed that she would be on probation one last time to see if she could clean herself up and be productive again. She extended the original probation from 3 to 6 months as a gesture of faith and the boss accepted. This, with support from her boss, helped her get back on the right track and become once again a functioning member of the team. Something as simple as sitting down to find the root cause can make all the difference. Letting go of the past and focusing on the future.
4. Acknowledge and reframe emotions
(http://psychcentral.com/news/2011/11/16/reframing-emotions-to-avoid-stress/31538.html)
Emotions play a large part in not getting things accomplished. In my work environment emotions run rampant, partly because of the operational tempo and pressures from all directions. Emotions come to their boiling point when workers don't take the time to remove themselves from the situation and realize that the emotions are mostly not directed at them. Once a person is able to remove the emotional connection to say, an angry boss, then they are able to process the yelling into something positive. A test (hypothesis) by Jens Blechert shows that people who see a picture of an angry face automatically feel the anger but when they are told that the anger is not directed at them, or reframe the emotions, then the bad feelings are removed and emotional tensions are also removed. “You can see this as a kind of race between the emotional information and the reappraisal information in the brain: Emotional processing proceeds from the back to the front of the brain, and the reappraisal is generated in the front of the brain and proceeds toward the back of the brain where it modifies emotional processing,” Blechert said.
5. Separate what matters from what gets in the way
Sticking to the facts and not letting personal feelings get in the way is the key to success, but in my organization we seem to blend all of these personal "walls" together creating small fortresses and making it hard to discern the factual material from the personal emotions. The old cliche still stands true that you shouldn't mix business and personal matters together. However, the personal matters are what shape a person and are sometimes the underlying motivations for business agendas. This can also tie into emotions and the ability to reframe. A set agenda, hard schedule times, keeping meetings no longer than they need to be, staying focused and staying on topic rather than diverting, these are all thing that help steers clear of what is in the way.
6. Solve problems paradoxically and creatively
Sometimes the best way to open your mind is to stop thinking about thinking. A book by Barry Long titled "How to stop thinking" expounds on this idea. The idea is to use your gut instinct and not to dwell on past events but rather think in the moment and think outside the box, or paradigm thinking. Thinking that "things have always been done this way" will hinder any organization and block creativity. Just because things have always been done a certain way doesn't mean they are being done the most productive way. Open mindedness, and receptiveness to new ideas will create an open pallet that allows fresh thinking and open collaborative discussion.
7. Learn from difficult behaviors
Learning from behaviors, wether good or bad, enables us to start acting like a team. My organization is plagued by doing the same thing over and over and not learning from mistakes. There has to be follow-up to a project in order to discuss 1) what should have happened, 2) what did happen, 3) what went good, and 4) what went bad. Not only discussing but writing down these key points pushes the mind to start thinking about how to make other projects more successful in the future. We do this in our organization but fail to utilize this key tool to shape future projects. (us army AAR process)
8. Lead and coach for transformation
(http://www.coachingtip.com/2011/09/what-is-entreleadership.html)
Passion is the key! "You cannot lead without passion. Passion causes things to move, and passion creates a force multiplier. Passion actually covers a multitude of sins. Real Entre Leaders care deeply, and that is basically what passion is. Passion is not yelling or being wild; it is simply caring deeply. When you care deeply about the organization, lots of things start to happen naturally.". Passion with vision, being able to see, and goals allows the organization to grow and flourish.
9. Explore resistance and negotiate collaboratively
Resistance is what makes my job very difficult. From my end I need to be able to find the resistance, point it out, and work through it. I also have to be able to sit down with my colleagues and work through resistance rather than trying to tackle it all by myself. Another collaborative effort in order to strengthen my organization.
10. Mediate and design systems for prevention
Being a leader in my organization, it is my role to help facilitate change. In order to best facilitate change in most organizations there seems to be a stigma or norm that says you have to change by force in order to get everyone to do the same thing and do it correct. I feel this may be a bit rash. I am certainly a child of the old school and I was taught to do what I was told. I have since passed some of that on to my children and possibly coworkers as well. After further analysis I think there are two factors that need to be considered: 1) If you hire people who have genuine courage, above candor or honesty or any of the other qualitative traits you can generally find the people who are willing to run through the fire. People who are willing to stand up for what they believe in, even in the face of adversity. The measure is not what do you believe in but rather what do you believe in when the walls are all crumbling down upon you? 2) Nurture the environment of letting people get the tasks done how they see fit. Not being a micro manager and hovering over people. Set the task, set the deadline, and let them run with it. Clearly define how deadlines work and all of the related rewards, responsibilities, and subsequent punishments if tasks are not completed. Leading with rewards will normally work much better than leading with punishments. Beyond that try to find out core systems of work and analyze them to figure out what systems are repetitive. For those systems that appear more than 2-3 times, a way to automate those is a good way to ensure they are not a resource suck.
lol nobody even opened the post :D I might review it later just skimmed to see the content. But I might be one of those first people doing that, what' up with that :)
who knows. ;-) its all good though. Just posting some of my mind on the net and seeing what happens from there. Thanks for the reply! :-)