It’s taken me two months to figure it out, but I have finally created a post that is “worthy” of the trending page. That being said, it is missing the essential ingredient to make it there.
THE ALL POWERFUL PAID UPVOTE
Let’s see how well it does without it.
You know, for science…
For best results read this with Russian accent in mind.
I Go Walk
Greetings my Steemit friends who also I calls Steemians,
Today I was deciding in mine mind what to do. I thinks, "hey why not go find most beautiful specimen and take photo shoot?
So so grabbing Nikon P900 I go walk,
Yay, most happy good time. I find chicken and birdy. Nice but not most beautiful specimen.
So I go walk more.
Oh very nice, small bird joining on me walk, but not treasure I be seeking. I settle only for most beautiful specimen.
Walking on in my quest to find perfection.
Stupid ugly swan, not even sure why me would take photo. But deny much loved Steemians the experience of walk? Never.
Discussed by agrogant swan, me decided to change path.
Almost giving hope up of finding me photo shoot. In the grass I spot something.
A little closer looking.
Yes, this one is dead, but if I look around a little more, just maybe, lucky day I will have.
Oh yes, this is what I seek.
Such beauty. So stunning.
Another angle really brings her colors.
Looks like me not only fan of "Perfect Specimen."
Well I hope you enjoy me journey as much as I enjoy bringing it to your likings. :)
Do not forget to vote up and resteem me.
And follow also.
And vote me witness.
Also I except steem and steem $ in transfers for unnamed charity ;^) Just put "For Charity" in transfer memo.
I will totally look at your post man for only 1 Steem, for 2 Steem 50% upvote, for 5 Steem 100% upvote, for 10 Steem I wills resteem and 100% upvote, for 20 Steem I will stand at street and hold sing with yours post url, For 50 steem I will Spam whale of yours choosing with your post 300 times for one day.
(introduceyourself)(walkwithme)(introducemyself)(trending)(jerrybanfield)
I hope you enjoyed my little satire. Seems like we have been getting a lot of “real" posts very similar to the “perfect specimen” of this one receiving massive payouts.
I would like to continue to write my novel on steemit, but until there is a more equitable solution to getting views that have quality as apposed to pure profites in mind(see My last post), or I build a large enough following interested in it. I will probably just have a bit of fun, occasionally pointing out what I see as the real “Reward Pool Rape.”
Please forgive me for exposing your eyes to such graphic poo.
Please do not be offended if you are Russian, I love virtually every Russian I meet, such a wonderful and strong people.
Please do not be offended if English is not your native tongue. My intentions were not to make fun of people with poor English, I just used it for comical effect.
Just In case it wasn’t obvious that I was joking, I will do none of the above mentioned things if you send me steem.
But if you feel compelled regardless, I’m happy to take any steem you may find lying around.
I have to give a shout out to @winstonwolfe his Post was probably the brain child for my own. You should definitely check his stuff out.
All photo's are originals by @imjustsaying
Quite Comical... You def had me fooled at first and was even reading the first few paragraphs with a nice Russian Accent!!
It was written with a Russian accent, so it only seemed fitting. I'm glad you enjoyed it. I'm going to try my hand a comedy for a bit. It's just more fun. No point in putting heaps of effort into something all serious just to see it fall the the wayside. I hope to hear from you again.
Someones been eating carrots......
As an aside, shoes look like on wrong feet..... put lens in other way around to correct.
your first $150 post for sure.
Me upvote and follow, you upvote me and follow and give me steem and buy me a house in the seychelles.
Great poost...
You made me giggle with the "perfect specimen" reveal, so you get my vote! Not that I like looking at poo, but a dramatic twist is always appreciated. ;)
Yeah I felt pretty stink about doing it. But was trying to recreate the sinking feeling one gets when they click on a $600 rewarded post to find out it's nothing but poo. :(
If i do more satire I'll try to avoid poo pics... for as long as I can. :^P
I think many of us feel the same frustration some days on here, so I get it.
I saw a huge pile in the stairwell of the parking deck at work the other day (downtown Atlanta, so not surprising), so poo seems to be a recurring theme this week for me! 🤣 Hopefully that's not fortuitous...
Best thing I have read on steemit today.
You win the steemit 3/6/18 trophy!
I'd like to thank my mom and dad for without them... Well I wouldn't be alive to write it.... :)
Absolutely the funniest thing I have seen on Steemit! I have been here a few weeks and don’t understand how some of these posts get such large payouts. It’s sad to see quality work, heart and soul poured out and ignored. I am here to make the community better, not post a meme and get a large payout. This was funny, but right on point. Keep Steeming!
Thanks Bro, you sure know how to make a fellow feel special. That's one of the nicest comments I've received on Steemit.
Yeah at first I was just going to do a lame-o one, but even when trying to recreate a bs post I still can't help but polish the turd up till it's all sparkly. It was actually really fun to do, I may do some more but the inspiration for the punch line has not struck me yet. Hope to see you back, I think i'm going to try to do more funny stuff. It doesn't hurt as bad when it doesn't get viewed.
HAHAHAAA!! Rolling! On! The! Floor! Loughing! That was hilarious!!! A little mean though. But that made it just more hilarious. Have you ever thought about making a travel blog??? XD Honestly I have never laughed about a post so much here. And people think memes were funny.
After posting this I've considered making a satire one(just without the poo). Unfortunately I don't have money or time to actually travel :(
Yes it was mean, I really do feel bad about it, that's why I apologized to everyone. But... It needed to be done... lol :)
Thanks for the resteem I just don't have enough eyes yet. <3
For me this was the best travel blog post I have seen so far here. And we all don't have enough eyes. And it needed to be done, absolutely, I wouldn't have had so much courage!
Again sorry for all the poo.
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btw, your name should be imjustsaiyan and your post should have been titled "Goten" instead of "gotten" (Just some Dragon Ball humor :)
I can't say that I ever really got into DBZ. I've seen snippets and I didn't understand why they were always seeming to flying battles. :) I think I was just to old when I first saw it. But maybe I should give it a go and actually watch an episode(I don't even know if they did movies). Would you be able to suggest the best one that would actually allow me to understand the DBZ world a bit better? I'm totally open to new things but figured I'm ask a fan.
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This is an impressive satire justsaying, you've got the flair for sure, hope you keep fanning the flame and nurturing this talent to a larger audience, if our community can help in anyway in @comedyopenmic / #comedyopenmic, let us know. Fun read for sure!