RE: The "What-Does-He-Have-That-I-Don't-Have-Issue" - Why Competing Is So Hard For Some Of Us

Thanks @surfermarly for such post,

How we define success also contributes to someone being envious. Actually, in many cultures, and due to certain kinds of motivation at childhood, success is all about being ahead of others. Such definition of success leaves no room in the mind for another definition. Thus, many don't have a goal of achieving something rather of being better than someone. It is about where you are at the social hierarchy that exist in many cultures.

When we trace things back to childhood, When the more successful member of a family takes all the attention and love of older members in such a way that another less successful one loses the love and attention he innately needs. He unconsciously, perceives such success as a threat.

Many parents actually blackmail their children into certain behavior which usually is compared to other children. That makes not only success, but also any good attribute about someone else becomes a threat.

For those who measure their success by emotional or financial rewards, the more others are successful the less rewards are left to them such as money and attention.

Thanks for your deep comment, that's been quite interesting to read!

Actually, in many cultures, and due to certain kinds of motivation at childhood, success is all about being ahead of others.

I love the American concept where success is something 100% positive and apetecible. Also being proud of one's achievements is a completely natural habit among Americans. That's even a great approach from a psychological point of view: if you're in an environment where success is something everybody's striving for and where people are celebrated for, then this is per se very motivational.

I've never been part of an environment where success was a priviledge reserved for a few. In my family we push each other and are incredibly happy for everything one of us accomplishes. I actually couldn't imagine it to be differently...

For those who measure their success by emotional or financial rewards, the more others are successful the less rewards are left to them such as money and attention.

I don't know where the idea comes from that success requires taking aways something from someone else. From my point of view, it's a completely counterproductive approach.

Again, thanks for stopping by and leaving your thoughts! That was quite enlightening.