Wow, didn't see this post coming especially after just reading your Vape Pen discussion. I been busy doing everything but visiting Steemit, just navigated down through my feed to your words.
I'm aptly characterized as a misanthrope, straight edge no tobacco, no alcohol, no drugs, vegan, reject faith in all forms, natural law is king, committed to the pursuit of infinite truth. Anything and everything I can share with you would be found in those paradigms. I suspect you wouldn't want to hear much of it...yet. However, if and when you wish to make personal inquiry to me per those parameters, you may email me at my private email [email protected].
I've been married to my wife for 38 years and we went steady for 8 years before we got married. The universe has brought me forward from hell to righteous fury. The random component is freewill. Search your heart and know the truth that you are here for a purpose. Life is a growth-centric experience, not a comfort-zone-centric experience. The truth is belligerent, the truth doesn't care. The universe will reward you, while you grow.
Pragmatism is simply aversion to principle. Beware the cannabis agenda, it's likely no more benevolent than the CIA flower power agenda revealed by Dave McGowan's book "Weird Scenes Inside The Canyon." Perhaps you should watch the 2017 movie called "Woodshock" while meditating on the Natural Law principles shared by Mark Passio.
The spiritual "help" you are craving isn't alien to you. The universe demands self-discipline as freedom is infinite. The choice is all truth or nothing. The time frame is the present moment which is infinite. You ain't lost, you are just resisting the present moment, and that always manifests suffering.
Spin up some Brian Jones Massacre and get straight, or don't. There is no future for men who don't man up. At least be tough enough to take as long a look on the straight edge side of the fence to know what your opportunity costs are. There's nothing cool about being slow, stupid and hungry.
Woodchuck Pirate
aka Raymond J Raupers Jr USA
woodchuckpirate.com