im going to explain this from someone is apart of this type of relationship that its not abuse and its 100% consensual!
here is the difference between d/s ( dominant and submissive)
D/s is about the building of a trusting relationship between two consenting adult partners.
vs
Abuse is about the breach of trust between an authority figure and the person in their care.
D/s is about the mutual respect demonstrated between two enlightened people. vs
Abuse is about the lack of respect that one person demonstrates to another person.
D/s is about a shared enjoyment of controlled erotic pain and/or humiliation for mutual pleasure. vs Abuse is about a form of out-of-control physical violence and/or personal or emotional degradation of the submissive.
D/s is about loving each other completely and without reservation in an alternate way. vs Abuse is hurtful. It is also very damaging emotionally and spiritually to the submissive.
D/s frees a submissive from the restraints of years of vanilla conditioning to explore a buried part of him/herself. vs Abuse binds a submissive to a lonely and solitary life of shame, fear and secrecy… imprisoning his/her very soul.
D/s builds self-esteem as a person discovers and embraces their long hidden sexuality. vs Abuse shatters and destroys a person’s self-esteem and leaves self-hatred in its place.
as for Sm her are some more example of the differences between the two
SM vs abuse
An SM scene is a controlled situation. vs Abuse is an out-of-control situation.
Negotiation occurs before an SM scene to determine what will and will not happen in that scene. vs One person determines what will happen.
Knowledgeable consent is given to the scene by all parties. vs No consent is asked for or given.
The bottom has a safeword that allows them to stop the scene at any time they need to for physical or emotional reasons. vs The person being abused cannot stop what is happening.
Everyone involved in the SM scene is concerned about needs, desires, and limits of others. vs No concern is given to the needs, desires, and limits of the abused person.
The people in the SM scene are careful to be sure that they are not impaired by alcohol or drug use during the scene. vs Alcohol or drugs are often used before an episode of abuse.
After an SM scene, the people involved feel good. vs After an episode of abuse, the people involved feel bad.
BDSM is an overlapping abbreviation of Bondage & Discipline, Dominance & Submission, Sadism & Masochism.
so lets explain what it is
BDSM is a variety of often erotic practices or role playing involving bondage, discipline, dominance and submission, sadomasochism, and other related interpersonal dynamics. Given the wide range of practices, some of which may be engaged in by people who do not consider themselves as practicing BDSM, inclusion in the BDSM community or subculture is usually dependent upon self-identification and shared experience.
iv noticed that many people think that it is abuse and maybe to some people it does but to the submissive its very erotic and just cause you dont like that kind of thing doesn't mean noone else can
its okay to not like BDSM but its not okay to judge .
i hope iv shed some light on this and people can see its not abuse !!
Nicely writen, and I couldn't agree more with you, I have talked to many submissives that got themselves into a D/s relationship that was unfortunately an abusive one.
Its a shame a few predatory types, use what is a fantastic relarionship dynamic. to abuse lost souls.
Im glad you have gotten out from under that abuser.
Followed and reading your other stuff.
Good luck!
I find it kind of ironic that you are clearly, well versed on what the core meaning of consent is, yet you can't seem to apply this understanding to all things. Government is non consensual. Government is rape. However, if you take the idea of governance and make it completely consensual it ceases to be immoral, in the same way that rape is immoral and BDSM is not. In the same way that assault is immoral, but a boxing match is not. To argue that "we need government though" is to argue "but how am I gonna get laid without raping someone?" Its beside the point. Wanting (or even needing) something does not entitle you to it. not to say you can't do immoral things in the sake of self preservation, but immoral actions in the name of self preservation do not magically become moral. Being alive is a privilege, not a right (despite what many people think). A true "right to life" would constitute immortality. What is percieved as a right to life is a positive right, or a right that requires action, which is not actually a right at all, it is the contention that maintaining your life is everyone elses responsibility, which is fundamentally absurd. The only legitimate rights anyone has are negative rights, also known as natural rights, or inalienable rights, which are rights that are not granted by anyone, rights which are inherent to existence, and mostly stem from your natural right to personal property (which government stands in violation of).
I find it a shame that you felt the need to follow me from one comment on a unrelated vid and make your point here...
I dont beleve, taxes are the same as rape, or abuse.
You want to follow me else where?
Cool, I find it a repulsive that you are in support of a fundamentally violent and coercive idea, and one that I am victim of, along with just about everyone else on the planet. So, you've got a lot more compassion from me than you remotely deserve. Taxation is unequivocally coercive in nature, in the exact same way that rape is. It is literally defined by it. Saying you don't believe it doesn't make it not true. This topic is any thing but unrelated, it's fundamentally identical, hence my trying to explain in a domain you clearly already understand. Sorry for having hope in you overcoming your unackowledged coercive nature, asshole. you are observably uninterested in peaceful conflict resolution, I recommend you try and change that for your own sake, along with everyone elses.
tax•a•tion (tækˈseɪ ʃən)
n.
Compulsory payments by companies or individuals to the state.
com·pul·so·ry (kəm-pŭl′sə-rē)
adj.
coerce
[koh-urs]
verb (used with object), co·erced, co·erc·ing.
to compel by force, intimidation, or authority, especially without regard for individual desire or volition:
They coerced him into signing the document.
to bring about through the use of force or other forms of compulsion; exact:
to coerce .
Nicely done @auracraft! I'll promote it if you sign up here. It is an interesting Ico
Great work!
Following and voted!
Good explanation and very important distinction. Kink on and steem on 🔥