Great point! I get where you're coming from now.
There are two schools of thought among evolutionary psychologists. I'll call them the orthodox view and the minority view. To your point, the orthodox view has indeed been influenced in many ways by modern customs. The minority view (which is gaining) is critical of the orthodox view for this reason and others.
The minority view, which I think answers your question directly, is best laid out in the book Sex at Dawn. It explains communal/tribal living quite well and contradicts the orthodox view.
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Fair enough, I guess put me down for the minority view then!