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What the fuck does it do and how will it affect STEEM’s price?

And why should I care?

lol. that's the million dollar question.

It's just like beads, tulip bulbs, and pretty sea shells that people may want to have, on a blockchain. Create your own coin and see if you can either get it to be widely accepted or at least make you rich before people realise it may not be The One and try the next one.

Influence on Steem price: unpredictable. Influence on you: a few good laughs, probably.

What the fuck does it do and how will it affect STEEM’s price?

And why should I care?

I just clearly said what a Token do. It's being traded between people. You don't have to care at all. Nobody knows what it will do to STEEM's price.