Living together (in society or in a relationship), ideally, does not automatically imply an elected leader as such and they certainly should not be inclined to oppose your free will: but true enough, one could be determined/appointed to take the lead in the moment or regards set specialisations perhaps.
Good cooperation agrees when one shall take the lead in a very practical manner (do the shopping, determine the meal, cook the dinner) and in equal relationships this leadership alternates - even if it seems one is more powerful, this is often deceptive and rather a "malady of soul" which has lost sense of right proportion and harmony (child wants to play - parent plays; parent wants to put child to bed - child bathes and puts on jammies; or child is terrorist or parent dictator). Give and take seems to be the clue here. We must learn to dance with eachother, but perhaps much depends on the music we choose to follow..... Trigonometry seems to help us regain the right sense of balance and adjustment: it is a measure by which to know much and act simply: it leads us down a path of harmonious proportion. We can follow the lead of wisdom. What is wise.... ah yes, now we seem to have landed in a Catch 22 but let's not ask a Wise Man to sort it our for us. Once you are exhausted of running after your own tail (spinning like a Sufi) you may see for yourself exactly what you need to do or be (and hey preso: you are your own leader).
We certainly tend to have multiple personas (even if not quite a multiple personaliy disorder), and this comes from not really knowing oneself or trusting one's own meaning to life (mission/impulses). I am a woman, a lover, a daughter, an artist, a patient, an academic... but are they personas? I hope not! They are aspects of Self taking control over different situations in my life. A good human being is like a Swiss Army knife...
Life is largely about learning to discover the voice of your soul, as coached by your divine Self, and often interrupted by your little ego (stimulated by other fearful pipsqueaks for its capacity for commercial success). Whichever role this actor-soul takes on on the stage of life will be legitimate. A man's gotta do what man's gotta do. It will always be taking the lead of it's own role/destiny. Flexibility and reacting in the moment is key. You can only do this when sure of who you are, in trust (which is clarity of vision).