How do you accept what is when it's not what you ordered? By "knowing" that you can come to no harm because in the end you are nothing and you control nothing because life unfolds as it should in its own time. When you realise that life is not personal and that you have control over only one thing and that is your reaction to any event. Good, bad who knows? The conception of Anni-Frid Lyngstad's from the band ABBA is an example of an awesome outcome, from what many considered an unacceptable liaison for which her mother was persecuted by those who interpreted her actions as being unacceptable to them. Absolutely no one has the ability to determine the future good or bad of any event. So what makes you think you can tell? The right philosophy is to accept that It's an ill wind that blows nobody (any) good.
Even death is an illusion of interpretation after all not one cell of our body at its death existed at its birth. All life is about constant death and renewal, a churn that never stops expanding in this moment. Yet everything is happening right now and all that is possible is already here but not imagined in to our world of particles yet. If you die right now so what? You are only a construct of your imagination and for the most part a construct at the hand of another at that. Your fear of dying is another misinterpretation, you fear to lose the timeline associated with your memories that is you, yet that is an illusion. This is best illustrated by those with dementia. There Ego along with its memories have atrophied, so they only have this moment and no feeling of loss or regret about what they failed at or didn't achieve. In this state death has no meaning anymore, in fact, it is the ultimate renewal. A renewal of the old and frail matter we have been mastering over a lifetime through recreation by the master creator.
Once you see the real you, then there's no turning back, and you will again view the World through childlike eyes enjoying the awe in every moment. The search then becomes one of discovery rather than attainment. A search also begins to find those others who are also awake to their infinite abundance so you can grow together into this new and expanding state. There is a realisation that even the most derelict and broken of people if somehow awakened are equally powerful creators for the good of all.
So what has to happen for you to realise you stink. I'm getting there but for now a tip. Everything on earth is an agreement of your senses. If you were having a conversation and you kept calling the sky green you would be called out, because the sky is blue, we all know that obviously. You could go on believing the sky is green, verte or kārerarera but for communication between others, we have agreed that it is blue, based on the three primary colours understood worldwide.
So through repetition of your native language with your guardians in your earliest years the light or rod cells in your eye connected a pathway in your brain that translated the colour it saw based on the verbal feedback you received. The more sophisticated that verbal feedback mechanism (language) the more accurate was your translation of what you saw, felt, tasted, smelled or heard. Over time you constructed a three dimensional model of your environment that is pretty accurate due to the feedback from others using the same language to reflect the feedback from their senses. So over a short period of time, we constructed a semantic model of our environment that became embedded in our subconscious as visible particles with mass, all from electrical feedback via our sensory nervous system.
From our earliest recollections, we can remember things from the model as our reality. I recollect events from as young as four years old, in this case playing with a skink in the garden of our home in Northcote, Auckland, New Zealand. This reality is without question a thing, even though it is an illusion of our translation of electrical feedback from our senses. These 5 feedback senses give us a pretty good representation of the physical World outside us. To illustrate, choose a room in the second last home you lived in. Close your eyes and walk around every room. Open the door to your bedroom, turn on the lights, feel the flooring beneath your feet, hear the sounds that you typically heard when you were there. I bet that your imagination is as strong as if you were physically there right now. In effect using your senses you can be anywhere you want to be right now. Even standing in the fine dust of the moon's surface. Take the room we just discussed and remodel it, change a few things around, reimagine it in the way you always wanted. Create a new room in your mind. This illustrates that All things without start within, and i mean ALL THINGS!
You, of course, could have made up your own language describing things around you as you experienced them but it would be a limited experience and definitely not as rich. Being able to connect to the experience through shared semantic tokens with others accelerates model formation, model accuracy, social growth, and survival.
However, just using language to identify the things in our material world is limiting our real experience as creators. Our language is to a large degree, fully formed and we go to school to learn how to communicate with those around us and so for many it becomes a boring task of learning labels. Language becomes no more than a way to identify contrasts in our physical world. That is a tree, this is a forest, I am good, he is not. We are taught to use language to make distinctions in our physical World and so it appears to be for things outside of us in the physical plane.
Yet our language is so much more important than that, in fact when used properly your whole experience of life will change for the better. We will see that our vocabulary and the way we use language defines our experience.