If you use an upvote service, they get angry. If you don't, your work doesn't get seen. You're damned if you do and damned if you don't...
First time
I've also not seen anyone else say (until now) not to ask for upvotes, follows or resteems after the end of a post. All of the whales I learned from had a blurb or even a banner asking for such at the end of their posts.
My last post was about domestic violence and steps women can take to avoid it. After six days, it sits with 1 actual comment despite my best efforts to promote it. I participated in a curation show which got a bit of attention for a prior post but cannot always be available to do that. I'm also grateful for the Steemians who gave it 20 cents in upvotes. I have seen WAY too many bloggers publish a pic of their neighbor, a half-eaten meal or blurry images of their street with more interaction than my last post.
If an article about ending domestic violence can't spark a discussion, I don't know what will...
New users should not be given false hopes that if they consistently put out good articles, they will attract engagement. Unless you're friends with a whale or buy upvotes, it's a crapshoot.
I think the problem here is you need to change your approach to networking and post promotion. While participating in a curation show can usually render at least short term positive results, it requires a little more effort than that to really achieve acquiring proper support. What else are you doing to network and promote besides a curation show? I really liked a couple articles on your blog, but you have not tried reaching out to me until now, likely since we both did not know the other existed yet. Sometimes hard work an patience pays off brother, we want to help people like you that care about the platform, and have quality content. Take a note out of your book and "keep on posting" buddy, stay positive, and the good graces will flow to you. Groups like the ones I am involved with seek to get rid of the need for paid bid-bots by conscious professional Steemians. I personally do understand why some people must use them, but am also aware of how they are a negative aspect of this platform, we are doing something about it.
I'd stop in and say "hello, how's everybody doing?" Then, nothing. I'd jump in again and again (at the right times, careful not to intrude) to complete silence. Hours later I returned to see if anyone had responded, nope.
I'd see the same 20 people come in and chat with their friends. Many of them started in 2016, I felt like I was crashing a class reunion at times. When there was an opening where I might know a fact, I'd offer it to complete silence as they spoke to each other as if I wasn't there. I still remember the day I spent HOURS on a SteemMonsters brainstorming server putting out great ideas and trying again and again to get the attention of the moderator. My images were ignored, links and shoutouts to the host as well, while he only seemed to see the messages from his well-known friends. I even wondered if I was muted somehow and asked if anyone was seeing my messages. @isaria was the only one who noticed my attempts, but by then I was so disgusted I left the server. I had tried to chat in at least six different chats that day (no post promoting) with no response at all. These guys all know each other and it's like trying to join an exclusive club.
Steemit Chat is no better.
Staying the course
As far as giving up, I'm still here. Aside from using post promotion links, I also just generally comment on interesting posts. I don't leave "nice blog" type comments (take a look, they're real) I did a lot of homework before I joined Steemit last year and knew what not to do.
The 20 cents on my last post didn't bother me. The single comment on an important issue like domestic violence did. I was frankly shocked by the lack of engagement.
I know part of this is due to the low price of STEEM, but this was happening long before that. When I used an upvote service, it attracted Plankton who left comments but also angered some Whales. When I stopped, the Whales were happy, but it cost me in comments and upvotes.
I have noticed some traction lately on the MSP Discord server and plan to continue stopping by as they have some great hosts and guests on their audio chats.
So I guess the solution is these "curators" might want to look beyond their small circle of friends and find content creators that care about Steemit for the platform to grow. I have no plans to leave. When stuff like this happens, I just take a break and slow down my posting output. If they want people to "stop dropping your links in postpromotion and leaving" they might want to look beyond their circle of friends and open up their private clubs on Discord.
I have had experiences like this in Discord servers as well. Some of them are just strait up run by rude people who ignore you, even if you have something genuine to offer. There are at least a couple good servers I can link you to that do not do this, and would be honored to meet your acquaintance.
Thanks for sticking in there with us, I am still here as well, and also have no plans to leave. This space is a quite a unique one, and we currently have a rare opportunity to mold it into something truly beneficial.
I'm sorry you got ignored. It happens to me too, a lot! Would anyone do that in RL? It's really rude. I think you just need to find the right server, as @elamental says - persist, because when you find a good one, they're awesome. I always try to engage with anyone who says hi in a server as it's just rude not to and I know how it feels to be ignored x
Also to encourage more discourse, try sharing you philosophical topics in the PhilosoForum Discord Server, here is a link: https://discord.gg/pXrDdRe
It is a problem indeed that many actors here only pay attention to their "feed" - and this "user authority"-idea is not really helping! I can imagine new users being frustrated, I've seen many high-quality posts being totally ignored. Posting good content is not sufficient in itself as long as one doesn't have followers.
What to do? Engage! Write comments on articles written by others. Give generous upvotes. Check out the various curation initiatives like steemSTEM etc.
Right! Engaging in other people's articles is a critical step for networking and something I forgot to add as part of the promotion explanation in this article. Thank you for mentioning this - great addition. I may have to update the article with this info as well.