thank you @firststeps for your feedback, I do really appreciate it, I really am opened to learning more.
The only thing I guess I would not do is change the order of the lines, as for me it would change my poem, which is a representation of how I can feel strong and quite quickly become more vulnerable, I was trying to capture how fragile we can be, especially when putting on a proud front. The rest of your feedback I really found helpful, so thank you xxx
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