Local Asshole Builds Autoflag Bot, Reportedly Extremely Proud of Achieving Something
Detroit, MI - Local asshole, known to his friends as @asshole, has finished building an automated flagging bot, which he has put to use in the social media network known as Steemit.
The asshole is reportedly extremely proud of his accomplishment, finally finding a place in his, after years of an uphill battle with an existential crisis one after another.
Steemstreet Journal's hard working team reached the local asshole for comments, and he gave us a brief history course in an exclusive interview:
Trolling is more than people think. It's an artform. And you need to go to school for it. I didn't just wake up on day and become what I am now. I started my career as an asshole on the internet on the YouTube comments section. That's how a lot of us get our start. I did that for about three years. I started with very basic stuff, such as commenting "faggot" on random videos.
After a few months, I extended my vocabulary to such an extent that I was soon formulating complete sentences, such as "suck my dick", as well as some very basic level your mom jokes. It was around this time that I also started frequenting professional wrestling message boards, telling everybody that it's fake. It was a brief, yet teaching experience, which allowed me to look at trolling from a very unique angle.
It soon became clear to me, though, that people who spend 20 hours a day on wrestling message boards are very hardcore into all different kinds of trolling, and it wasn't a platform I was ready to conquer yet.
(Steemstreet Journal's own @schattenjaeger is one of the above mentioned people, and he concurs with this statement.)
Asshole goes on to say:
After a few years asking libertarians who will build the roads on Facebook, I came across Steemit. That was the day I knew: that's the ticket. I became fascinated with coming up with ways to troll the Steemit community, until I finally came up with my masterplan to build an automatic flagging bot. It was a stroke of genius. My bot automatically flags every post on the platform! This way, I get noticed. People talk about me. I make a difference. I matter. People call me a loser for living in my mom's basement at 43, but now I can finally throw this at their faces.
We also asked about Asshole's future plans, now that he's on such a roll:
The sky is the limit. I feel so empowered right now, it's amazing. I was able to do this, I'm able to do anything. Today, flagging bot on Steemit - tomorrow who knows? I may get a job. I may put pants on. I may even build a bot that automatically pokes people on Facebook.
Steemstreet Journal would like to wish Asshole the very best in all his future endeavors.
Who cares about any other news media having steemstreetjournal !?
Thanks for the laugh! I cried at 'I may put pants on.' :-D
Even I struggle with that sometimes..
There are days it is simply not worth it...:-D
@schattenjaeger, this is the first of what is to become an epic literary phenomenon - you have started something which will, I hope, become part of steemit folklore. In the next instalment, can you ask Mom a few questions - she would be a terrific interviewee!
An interview with Asshole's mom regarding her son's accomplishments is actually not a bad idea. I try to do these only when I have the inspiration for them. I want to keep a high-ish standard.
So, I won't force myself to make a journal post. But I'll throw that one in the idea hat.
wonderful "interview"! :D Thanks for the laugh ^_^
You're more than welcome. Glad it made you laugh. :)
Good one! I thought you had actually tracked him down for a moment ;>
I did! My team works very hard. Especially considering the extremely low pay I compensate them with.
the beatings will continue until morale improves ;>
Lol!
Good one...I wonder if he's astute enough to flag the nice profile I made for him on Herpes.org!
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trust @schattenjaeger to get to the bottom of the asshole. No alternate facts here.. just the straight up ones.
Not as straight up as your indifference to mass migration.
haha love it :D
I'm just glad that loser got tracked down and it's over.
This is brilliant! Thanks, I love a good belly laugh in the morning :)
Thanks for reading. :)
I wanted to say Thank You for providing me some humor for the evening.
