Good day great steemians.
I am indeed grateful to you all for reading and upvoting my last post. Today, I want to share with you how I overcame the fear of spitting while speaking.
Spitting while speaking can be very embarrassing especially when your choice of career requires that you constantly speak to young adults, who depending on their level of maturity may express their surprises to the saliva droplet flying out of your mouth in a way that can add frustration to your embarrassment!
I knew a lecturer when I was a postgraduate student in the university, who spits unintentionally when he lectures. If that lessens the respect any of us had for him, I don't know it. But then, we were matured set of students. Some of my colleagues were already married with children and others belong to what we call "working class". So, we were all well behaved when receiving lectures regardless of what we saw in the lecturer.
I never thought of spitting unconsciously while speaking as a big deal until I took up my current job as an assistant lecturer in a private university in southwestern Nigeria. As part of my job, I have to teach fresh year students of college of natural and applied sciences and some other colleges, basic chemistry and I was glad to do it because I have always enjoyed teaching.
I, however noticed several months into my job that while I excitedly lecture these students who were usually above one hundred in number, a handful of them will just burst into laughter spontaneously for no obvious reason. No matter what gimmick I employed, I couldn't get any of them to tell me why they laugh embarrassingly like that when I was doing my utmost to teach them. Although when I resorted to threatening, many of them became well-behaved and the incidence was reduced to an occasional thing with the laughter becoming short-lived for fear of being found out.
After a long time, I found out that droplet of saliva fly out of my mouth intermittently when I lecture! What? I was embarrassed beyond measure.
When I discovered.......
When I discovered, I was not only embarrassed, I was overwhelmed. My mind was flooded with a lot of questions. I could only think of how the problem was going to hinder my future prospect. Is this a new disease? If so, when did it start?
Like I mentioned earlier, I have always enjoyed teaching. I have virtually taught all cadre of learners below my qualifications. I had taught nursery school children, primary school pupils, secondary school students and leavers awaiting admission into the university in several tutorial centers in two different states in Nigeria before taking my current job as an assistant lecturer. I even taught some of my colleagues as an undergraduate student in the university.
So, why haven't anybody informed me about this before now? To say I was afraid and disturbed is an understatement. I became self-conscious whenever I had to lecture. The more self-conscious I was, the worse the problem grew and the more miserable I became. I started to die silently! I literally dodged and turned down every avoidable teaching assignment and invitation to speak in public. Even to meet a stranger became a herculean task. Can you imagine a lecturer fidgeting before a stranger? I was like a fish out of water.
My search for solution
When I couldn't bear it any longer, I opened up to some of my closest friends and a colleague about my challenge. "It happens to everybody once in a while. Don't let it bother you." That was the sum of their replies. I felt I wasn't taken seriously. Can't they see what a threat this is to my prospect in life?
Not satisfied with their answers, I went online in search of solution.
Most of the materials I found on spitting while speaking were from blogs. The problem could simply be attributed to excess accumulation of saliva in the mouth prior to conversation or a serious underlying illness like Parkinson's disease and Bell's palsy. Although it seemed unlikely, I choose to believe the former reason was the cause and so I started to practice the various preventive measure which I learnt could cure the problem. They consisted of the following:
- Swallowing before speaking
- Speaking calmly and slowly
- Minimizing intake of sugary food which can stimulate saliva production
- Taking sunflower seed with lime
- Practicing before a mirror
Practicing these techniques, only made matter worse for me because I became boring and uninteresting to my listeners while trying to speak calmly and slowly. I was accustomed to speaking with gusto. Again, I started avoiding sugary or sweet foods and all that without any noticeable improvement.
My journey to the Hospital
When I couldn't take it any longer, I went to the hospital. You are possibly wondering why it took me this long to seek medical help. I'm not sure you will believe it if I tell you why. Nevertheless, I will. At the risk of being labelled a fanatic, I was reluctant to go to the hospital because for almost a decade, I have always received healing from God through faith in the sacrifice of Jesus as revealed by the Bible regardless of the nature of the sickness from which I may suffer. I didn't want to break this record. It's sure more cost effective! But when my faith could no longer handle it, I went to the hospital believing God could still help me through the doctors.
I explained my dilemma to the doctor and he listened attentively to my predicament. After questioning and examining me for a few minutes he told me that that there was no medical solution for my problem. I was unusually calm. I looked into his eyes and asked whether he thought the problem was psychological because some bloggers have actually noted that spitting while speaking is more often psychological rather than physiological.
I don't think so, said the doctor.
Can a speech therapist be of help? I queried again.
Speech therapist? He asked. No! You are a matured man already. It may work for children but not for an adult like you. He paused for a while. Then he said, I have been observing you since you came in here, and I didn't see any saliva droplet flying out of your mouth. Are you a different person when you lecture? No sir, I answered, I am not a different person when I lecture but I sure do speak louder than this.
He later took me to a man he introduced to me as a dental surgeon. He might be able to help you better, he concluded before taking his leave.
The surgeon asked me to fill a questionnaire. When I did, he examined the roof of my mouth thoroughly.
From what I can see here, the level of saliva in your mouth is normal and I don't think anything is wrong with you. He tried to encourage me before dismissing me. I was disappointed that my problem was not resolved but happy that I wasn't diagnosed with any underlying disease.
Help came from an unexpected quarter
Time will fail me to tell in detail how I met my wife amidst this circumstance, but to justify the title of this post I mustn't fail to mention that when I got married to my wife some months ago, she through her unconditional love, constant positive affirmations and "feminine influence" restored to me the confidence that I needed to address not only my students but any group of people without being afraid that I might spit while I am speaking.
My wife was never opened to the idea that I spit when I speak from the first day I told her about it. She wouldn't hear of it no matter how many times I brought it up. She has a characteristic way of dousing the matter in a way that is difficult to explain.
I eventually lost the consciousness of spitting while speaking and I observed also the corresponding comportment of my students once I was straightened out. The challenge I couldn't overcome on my own nor through the help of caring people all around me, I overcame through my wife's persuasive faith and unconditional love.
My advice
If you are of a marriageable age and you so desire, you might want to consider getting married to enjoy the camaraderie between spouses. And if you are married already, your spouse needs your unconditional love and unwavering faith in him or her. Two are truly better than one.
Thanks for stopping by to read my post. Your comments are highly cherished just like your upvote.
Until the next time, keep on steeming.
Hi @saintgentle!
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Hummm, @saintgentle I would say, you actually made yourself went through the unnecessary ordeal, you tortured yourself as nothing was wrong with you. In my observation, the problem started while you were at your post graduate class, you retained the image of your Lecturer spitting in your mind, and the fear was there, so when your own students noticed that in you, the image of your Lecturer pumped in your mind and the fear came in.
I see it as a self torture, you should know that an average person talking for a long period of time can begin to spit, though that is quite different from drooling. Your best medication is self esteem and don't allow the thought to stay in your heart.YOU ARE OKAY!!!!!. Btw , you have a lovely wife there, she is so beautiful, my greetings to her.
Thank you very much @steep2308. Your assertion that I am okay is definitely very correct. I have heard many loving people around me say just exactly that and you have just added your testimony. I choose to believe you and I will definitely convey your greetings to my wife.
THank you for your post.
I need to slow down when speaking & swallow before talking
Hope to see you back on Steemit some day.