Surround yourself with the right people - Epictetus SHW #51

in #stoic6 years ago

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The key is to keep company with those who uplift you, those whose presence calls forth your best.
-- Epictetus

The quote is a beautiful statement made by Epictetus which strongly indicates the importance of surrounding yourself with those who want the best for you. To develop this further, we need to look at how you actually surround yourself with those kinds of people. First of all, it must come from within.

Who are you?
What do you stand for as a person?
Who do you aspire to be like? (although this isn't the best tactic it often helps with understanding ourselves better.)

You really need to understand and value yourself in order to create and maintain successful relationships. It has been said in modern times by many thinkers like Tim Ferris, that you are the absolute product of the 5 people you spend the most time with. So ask yourself, who are those five people?

Are they supportive of you? Have they got a vision and a meaning in life? When you succeed, are they celebrating with you or are they bitching behind your back in jealousy? Are they honest? Are they caring and do their values align similar to yours? Even better, have you got a friendship where you disagree on a lot, but you constructively make each other better beings of society - pushing each other to vicariously learn? Do you find yourself crying with laughter and love when in the presence of this person?

These are just a few things to consider when thinking about your 5 people.

Think about what you wish to become, and where you want to be, are your current friends catalysing your destiny, or are they holding you back?

It might be time to gradually cut ties with a few... Life is too short after all.

Have a wonderful week!

Prosoché, Prokopē & Phila

Adam x

Who was Epictetus?

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Born into slavery 55AD Epictetus is the famous Stoic of whom is most influenced by God, or the Greek Gods as they were in those times. His slave master was very fond of him and allowed him to study philosophy in his spare time, and this is when he was exposed to the ‘Stoa’ teachings by his mentor Musonius Rufus. Epictetus gained freedom from slavery shortly after Emperor Nero’s death and subsequently began teaching philosophy. He taught stoicism for the rest of his life, even when forced to leave Rome as philosophers were banned in Rome, he simply moved to Greece and taught for his remaining days until he died in 135AD. His tao is spread over a few books, each of which is harder reads when compared to Aurelius or Seneca’s writings.