It amazes me that so many of us grew us afraid to be an individual.....
I was always shy,I was never comfortable being myself.
My family was close knit ,always together ...We never stressed looks
I was misunderstood as a teen & a young woman as people thinking I was stuck up..I was insecure & kept to myself ,had a few close friends but I never liked to stand out & I did ...
I felt at times like I didn't even belong in my family! I was the only one with Strawberry blonde hair green eyes and very fair skin.
My mother had blue eyes & blondish hair but at least she tanned ....I burned so bad in the summer I was in pain!
I have two teenage boys ,one like me hates to stand out from others ,my other son doesn't care ....he says,dresses and is himself not caring if he fits in,which makes him more appealing.
I have conversations with my boys and you would think a 15 yr old & a 17 yr old would not have the thoughts they do ...
They grew up so unlike me it is to me astounding
I grew up with both parents and grandparents close Aunt's Uncle's cousins in the same neighborhood same small town until I was 30.
My husband,their father & I split up a few times while they were small.
Finally splitting for good right after my youngest 2nd birthday.
My father had gotten sick so we had moved back to NY and my mom watched them while I worked so it was easier to just all live together.
They grew up in a middle class home lacking nothing but a father,who wanted nothing to do with us...
After my Dad died I was so depressed that my Mother thought it may be easier on me moving back to Las Vegas.
Well,it was & wasn't.
You see we resided in a small town 99.9% white.
Las Vegas is very diverse even in Summerlin area ,where we live.
Out here the school system rates down to the bottom of the country and my boys as young as they were saw it.
Children we're not rewarded for being individuals, they were in a building being brain washed and worse they saw it for what it was.No one cared,it was so sad.
A year after we moved here my mother was killed in a car accident and the three of us sat on my bed and were lost.
I hired a maid ,threw myself more into my work and of course this was the worse possible thing I could do.
Finally after 10 months it took me to realize what I was doing & quit my job, rebonded and the three of us grieved properly.But in doing so we rapidly went thru savings & so we went from middle upper to homeless....
I look back now on things and realize that these boys have lived thru so much and all the bad stuff,they still found good ,they had each other, they saw/see the world for what it really is...
They see the problems with the Government,they see the issues with family,fiance ,and everything else as an adult would .
I blamed myself for so long but I see that something great will be achieved thru all of this .
My boys are not afraid to be different,to think feel and say what they mean.
Rarely in life will you meet someone who will say what he means and means what he says ....that person is my youngest son.I am so very proud of them. ..they didn't complain when we had no Christmas or when we lived out of a suitcase for months ...
We finally have a home,we r grateful for ,it is being furnished one thing at a time but we r almost "normal"again.
And if they didn't live thru all they did I don't know if they would be the individuals they r now .
And I never realized how spoiled I was ..always had a home a car money food clothing we lacked for nothing ....When you put your head upon that pillow remember be grateful. ...we had no pillows for a few months we slept upon a time floor three us one blanket no pillows and we were just happy to have a roof above our head and one meal a day was a feast for them.
I believe things happen for a reason and circumstances change our outlook on so much .We tell stories that if we had known what was going to happen but ifs and buts ..u never know ...
But we do now know never to judge and to do say and be ourselves because we should be proud of all we lived thru and made it thru and they refuse to be brain washed into thinking others thoughts.
And we help others every chance we get becuz we know ..we have been there.
Your article is very inspiring! It hit me very hard. Reminds me of a constant struggle I am having. My family expects me to graduate college when I have no passion to. My father is a manual laborer and reminds me everyday that if I don't graduate I will be a failure. He has no education past high school.
My mother is a teacher who degrades my father. When I tell her how unhappy I am in school, she belittles me. I have a passion for real estate.
When I have kids, I want to raise them like you did. Accepting of individuality. My generation is attached to "filters" resulting in fakeness. There needs to be more people like you teaching their kids to "stand out of the crowd" and be different. Thank you for your post, you've earned a follower from me!
Thank u! You must follow your dreams & your passion ....u can always take classes online if u wish ,but do not live the dream your parents have for you. ...you want to wake up each morning and smile ! Love what u do and u will be happy!
And by the way I have a Bach.degree _ 3 yes law school & I made more $ _ was happier doing work w.o those degrees...Life has chged ..your parents do not realize it
Nice post. You have written well... Inspiring. Thanks for the post..