Did you miss the previous post about my book launch? If so, you can Click Here to read it.
It's hard to believe we’re only one day away from the book launch! I've been excited about each book I've ever published but this one seems different. There is a special feeling of excitement surrounding this book and I won't know exactly what that means until it's released out into the world. My main goal with this project is to help people and I feel that meditation has the power to do this.
It's been an extremely busy week, a flurry of last minute preparation, trying to make sure all of the details are taken care of. I apologize if I haven't answered all of your comments but I promise I will. Once again you, the Steemit community, have blown me away with the level of support you've given me and my work. I wanted to thank you all for the Upvotes, Comments, and Resteems for these chapter excerpt posts.
Please join my here tomorrow, Sunday, June 25th, for one of the first book launches ever on the blockchain! I hope you enjoy this next chapter!
Chapter Four
What is the key to conquering your worst fear? All you need to do is one small thing per day that scares you. Believe me, I know. I suffered from debilitating depression in my early twenties. Why? I got into a practice of not facing my fears. Instead, I ran away from them. Each time I did this I became more disappointed in myself and as a result the fear gained power and my self-confidence decreased a little each time. The accumulative value of these little (and sometimes big) disappointments in myself over the years contributed greatly to the anxiety and depression that eventually gained complete control of my life.
I would guess that this is a common cause of depression and anxiety for a lot of people. Throughout my years of meditation, I’ve learned a few things about facing fear. The most important thing I’ve discovered is that fear itself is both a bully and a coward. If you start standing up to your fears, even if you do it a little at a time, your confidence will grow. The fears will begin to have less and less power over you.
Very few of us were born brave but this doesn’t mean bravery can’t be mastered. When I was young, I was terriffed of public speaking. I mean terrified. Countless opportunities were passed up because of this fear. I’m ashamed to admit that one of the reasons I didn’t finish college was I was trying to avoid the anxiety of group discussions and speeches. I even passed up the chance to give a best man speech at my brother’s first wedding because of this fear.
Everything began to change when I started to challenge this horrible bully that was so severely limiting my life. I started small. First I made it a point to speak up in morning meetings at work. Each time I did, I gained more confidence and felt a tiny rush of inner pride.
After a few years of challenging myself to take more risks, I agreed to co-facilitate a meditation class at work. There were about fifty people in the audience and it was a huge success. That same year I gave a best man speech at my brother’s second wedding. To my surprise, the wedding planner approached me afterwards and complimented me on that speech!
My point is, I kept picking away at this fear with every opportunity that presented itself, and this is the key to conquering any fear. I kept raising my level of tolerance and confidence until fear no longer had a hold on me. Since then, I’ve appeared on radio and television to promote my books, been interviewed on a podcast, given speeches in front of hundreds of people, and now teach weekly meditation classes. Any fear can be conquered.
It’s helpful to spend time with people who already have the attributes that you wish to gain. I’m naturally an introvert and one of my good friends is extremely outgoing. We go to Chicago every year for a long weekend of food, music, and sightseeing. He can easily strike up conversations with people he’s never met. As a result no one seems like a stranger; we’ve gotten some of the best advice, and have met some incredibly interesting people. By the end of the weekend I find that I’m much more outgoing just from spending time with him.
PUTTING IT INTO PRACTICE
Think about one fear you have, large or small, that you would like to get rid of. Contemplate how this fear limits your life and how that limitation makes you feel. Now, make a solemn commitment to take a small step each day towards conquering it.
Start very small if you need to, but the important thing is to start.
For example, if you’re naturally shy around new people make it a point to make eye contact and say hello to a stranger in an elevator. Then the next day strike up a simple conversation. Again, taking incremental but systematic steps in challenging your fears are the key to success.
If heights are your fear, the next time you’re in a tall building walk up to the window, take a deep breath, and force yourself to look out at the landscape and then down to the street. Whatever your fears are all it takes are small measures each day to desensitize yourself from them. With dedication and effort eventually you’ll conquer them.
Write down one fear you would like to work on this week. Each day take a small step to challenge that fear. Document your results at the end of every day. Once you feel as though you’ve beaten that bully, choose your next target, another of your fears and repeat the same steps. After a while, your list of fears will be considerably shorter or possibly even non-existent. Once you experience the confidence gained from this practice, it become a mission to slay all of your fears one by one.
Do you want to be more successful, happier, and have a greater sense of self-confidence? If so, do one small thing every day that scares you.
Success
and a scarred sage
I am approaching
that certain age
when you learn
that each decision
matters.
a bully and
a coward
stand up to it
more than
once and it
shatters.
has felt
the glory
of the dawning
of this dream
to be found
a few steps
beyond the
searing pain
of defeat.
you fall
you must rise
again to your feet
because with persistence
you will win
and this success
is so sweet.
Thank you for reading. Please join me here tommorrow...Sunday, June 25th for the official launch of The Perfect Pause!
*I am an American novelist, poet, traveler, and crypto-enthusiast. If you’ve enjoyed my work please sign up for my author newsletter at my website. Newsletter subscribers will receive exclusive updates and special offers and your information will never be sold or shared.
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I`ve been reading your posts and they all sound fascinating, time to put those into practise! Looking forward to the book launch, I wish you success!
Thank you! I'm glad you're enjoying the posts!
I'm glad that you fought this 'bully' of fear
I hope I can do the same as well.
An amazing poem by the way!
Good Luck with the book Launch tomorrow.
I appreciate the kind words! I'm very excited about tomorrow.
The reality is that we are not trained from childhood to speak in front of many people without fear!
That is so true. My generation definitely were raised to be "seen and not heard."
Very exciting time. I will be looking for the launch!
Haiku for you:
The cool morning breeze
sent of jasmine in my nose
time to meditate
Wonderful haiku, Lakshmi! Thanks!
Happy you like it, all the best!
I'll try conquering my fear of spiders.....thanks for motivating
And yes this poem is amazing... I'll share it with my love... She needs it very much.. Thanks 😊
That's a very common fear for sure! Thank you for reading and for your support!
Getting inspiration from your poetry I have written something if you have time do read it
I saw her in front of lab
I felt a feeling fab,
I did a little dab
And took her number slab,
Than we did some talking
And went on a little waking,
Ocassionaly did some stalking
When my heart went on hawking,
Then I took her on a date
Omelette was that we ate,
We got a little late
As we let the clocking blate,
We went on travels together
sharing moments we will miss ever,
The Love the feelings will last forever
But she can't be mine ever.
It's for a poetry competition in which I chose to write on first love :)
Wow! You are a Great Writter! I read Your Previous Posts and They are Quit Awesome! Please Continue...I just Had to Follow and Resteem Your Post!
I appreciate the kind words. Thanks!
Anytime!
You are an exceptional individual, who has grown with life's trials and tribulations. Each step along life's path has made you stronger, wiser and braver. Despite a step backwards you always seem to have taken two forward. You have come a long way to becoming who you are today. Your Chapter 4 - Conquering Fear was poignant for me. Fear has always stunted people from trying, doing and becoming. I'm glad you covered this very important area in your book. We all need to face our fears and not let it do its destructive best to make us feel like failures or question and/or doubt ourselves. Congratulations on a beautiful book. Wishing you all the best tomorrow. Just like your beautiful Success poem: "Each time you fall, you must rise again to your feet, because with persistence, you will win and this success is so sweet." Thank-you for your gift to us! ......Cabbagepatch
Thank you for the incredibly humbling words. Much of my unwillingness to give up comes from the lessons my parents instilled in me when I was young. We never had much money but they both taught me to dream big and to work hard. My mother and father both came from modest blue-collar backgrounds but never discouraged me from wanting to pursue writing, even for the couple of decades that I barely made a dime at it. I was lucky to be born in life as the child of those two. I owe them a lot and am having great fun spoiling them now. : ) Again, I really appreciate your words.
Your parents are truly a blessing to you in that they taught you the most valuable lessons of working hard, never giving up and dreaming big. I also have been blessed with two hard working parents who gave me love, encouragement and faith and who also believed in hard work and helping others without expectations. I guess we are both lucky because I feel we both have been given a wealth of knowledge to share with others and the generosity of giving and sharing it. You should be very proud of yourself and your family, because I truly feel that you went through what you did so that you can help others. How can one relate unless they to have experienced the challenges, hurts, pains others go through? Each challenge is a lesson learned and a growth in wisdom and knowledge. Your are exceptional and a blessing!.....Cabbagepatch
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great post.
Thanks!
welcome.😊
nice post
thank you for sharing. ericvancewalton~
You're welcome! Thanks for reading.
Follow me, and i will follow you too
All the best buddy. Keep going.
Thanks!
The ultimate benefit of meditation is liberation of the mind from attachment to things it cannot control, such as external circumstances or strong internal emotions.
That is definitely one of the many benefits!
Very insightful, my friend. Like it a lot. Cheers!
Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it!
Congratulations @ericvancewalton
You took 55 place in my Top 100 of posts