Man, Anna ... shakes my head these are the kinds of actions when I wished for Jared all those chapters back. Sometimes she's really just so selfish. Sure, she needed to call her dad, but she could've just blurred away at any instant. I get that she's been feeling depressed with her situation, but is that enough reason to risk the lives of these innocent (and seemingly fun) people? With the way things are going, no matter how much explanation she would tell Jared, none of it would be believed. I just hope this steadfast Jared (sans all the bad stuff) would remain vigilant even when he figures out the whole story regarding Anna.
Nice touch using the tone of voice for the dialogue, sis! I read every dialogue (even Camilla's and Shannon's) in the baritone Boom voice of our Spectacular Scottish Scott @meesterboom haha! It really gives that sense that she's operating in Scotland, even without all the visuals entailed. These are the writing techniques that are often overlooked by most writers. But, as you have established many chapters ago, you're not just any run-of-the-mill writer :D Magnificent work, sister!
It's funny to me how hard you are on her :) And actually it's a good way of measuring that I keep my characters consistent :)
Thanks! I definitely tried, and I've gotten positive reviews about that from everyone...but the man in question who thinks it's funny hahaha! I imagine coming from the actual place may make a wee bit of difference LOL I'm writing it the way I hear it on TV though, so that is probably a whole lot different than being there, especially depending on where you're from. If someone wrote a Southern American accent, it would only work if they were writing about being in the south for instance :)
Lol, I tried reading it like me too. It wasn't the easiest thing but I will award @dreemit full marks for her attempt!!!
Although I will be having words. Strong Scottish words!! ;0)