When my oldest son was about 16, he had a very good friend who I will call Joe, who was half Mexican & half “white”. He came from a broken home, divorced parents. His mother was a drug addict and had (I believe) five other children with several different men. His father had basically just checked out of his parenting role.
This boy was at my house constantly. I gave him rides from his house to our house, I took him to his driver's classes, he ate many meals with us, and stayed the night at our house frequently. He had no structure, no guidance, no one to teach him about life…guess you could say I basically assumed that role. He was a great kid and I would have done anything to help him.
At one point, he had been living in a townhouse with his mother and just one of his sisters. I would pick him up from this townhouse and I would bring him to our house so he could hang out with my son and us.
At some point I realized something was wrong with his living situation, the more I observed this townhouse when I was there to pick him up, something just felt off. He finally broke down and told me that his mother had abandoned him and his sister. He was embarrassed and he didn't want anyone to know. The sister had gone to the grandparents house to live and Joe stayed at the townhouse, even after utilities had been cut off. I assume the landlord had taken back possession of the townhouse, and Joe had nowhere to stay. I believe the landlord had disposed of the contents of the townhouse, including all of Joe's clothing.
When I found out this had happened, I went out and bought him some clothes, the basics. Nothing fancy, nothing expensive.
I let him stay at our house for several weeks, and tried to help him figure out what he was going to do. He had discussef the military with me on numerous occasions and always had the utmost respect for my (now ex) husband.
Although the war in Iraq was in full swing, we told him that there are many career fields they wouldn't put him in harm's way. We just had to make sure that he made a good choice watch using his career field. Since he was a smart kid, I knew he would score well on his ASVAB tests, and we would help him to make a decision which career field to enter.
My husband was retired from the Navy as an officer and he was very supportive of our young men joining the service, but agreed with my opinion that you need to make good choices in your career rather than just taking the biggest sign on bonus.
The day I lost all respect for my husband was the day that he realized I had gone out and bought Joe clothing. I don't know what my husband's problem was, but he hit the roof!
A little background on my husband… he's a Cuban descent and came to the states as an immigrant at the age of five, his parents settling in the Bronx. He was very well educated, a retired Naval officer, and started his civilian career, making VERY good money (6 figures +). This was NOT a financial burden on us!
He always called me a “fucking bleeding heart liberal”, which was supposed to be an insult, although I thought of it as a compliment.
So…here he is having his tantrum over me spending a couple of hundred dollars on clothes for a kid with nothing.
My husband had the balls to make the following comments about Joe in front of my 14 year old son. He obviously disagreed with me purchasing anything for this poor kid, and then these words came out of his sick mouth… “I can't believe you've gone out and done this… we don't even know this kids lineage!”.
Well, in a nutshell, my husband is extremely prejudice of other Hispanic cultures. And since we didn't know this kids lineage, we should not help him? That was the day that I realized what a disgusting human being my husband was. And don't think that this went unnoticed by my 14 year old who who is listening to these comments he made. I can't say that my son lost respect for him as I did, but he's repeated my husband's comments many times since that day. He should be ashamed of himself. I am grateful that I can call him my text husband.
And if you want to know what ended up happening to Joe? (He knew nothing of the comments my husband made.) Joe decided to enlist in the army afterall, and he asked my husband to please be the man to enlist him. What a privilege and honor he gave my undeserving husband, if only knew what a piece of shit he is.
Real
My husband did enlist Joe into the army, and he's doing very well. He's made it his career. Joe got married and has had three children. I am so proud of Joe! And it's been an honor knowing him since he was a kid.
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