#teardrops# my misery night

in #teardrops7 years ago


It was 11:00 pm, It was the first time I could not close my brown eyeballs. This quiet night, I turned on the musical instrument he once gave me. Without me realizing the flow of warm water soaking my cheek, I remember the whole story of my past, I slowly remembered a face that once laughed with me, Remember how I pinched his pipe, making his amused because of my attitude. But as time goes by, everything does not fit with what I want it, I'm too possessive, I'm too jealous of making me have to part with her. The heart says "do not do this" but the tongue says "break up". I have spent much of my day with my sorrow, whether Satan has entered my mind, I feel that all the orgs especially he is never right, which I think is right, always.

2 days every night, I never dreamed beautifully, never slept soundly. My tears never stopped, crying not because of her mistake, but I cried because I had let go, away from my life.
I remember the last word when he and I split up, only made me more guilty because of my treatment. I am selfish as a woman, just want to be understood, just want to be loved, just want to be loved, but I tax conscious have injured orag who have willingly do it all to me.
If I can spin time, if I can repeat yesterday, do not want me to say things I do not need to say, do not want me to do things I do not need to do. But unfortunately, "rice has become porridge" has all happened, can not be repeated, but it can only be improved.
Since parting with him, I never heard his voice, I never heard the words that often for me blushed his embarrassment. never lg I made him to persuade me because my childhood act. All is lost, lost as the night darkens

Since then, I started to find out what I do, what he feels, I do not want him to be sad like me, do not want to see the gloomy face of his face, which is caused by me. Because what .. because I would feel guilty if he who I love unhappy because of me.
But the taste I aimed for him, felt amusing to me. What I received was not the beauty of loving her in my heart, but the torture of heart because of the attitude she directed to me. Is this the reply for me, wasted the org who I love first, but my group is very hurt because of his cynical attitude to see me ..
I can not see the face, I can not get close to it lg, I can not hear the voice out of his lips, because for me, it is an arrow that is ready to bring to my wound that has not been completely dry.

But that's what I asked from the beginning, I can not hate him, I can not melupan him, I can not always look at him with a face full of hatred. Until finally I had to remain silent, in front of him.
if the org is easy to forget the one you hate when you find a better lg, but in my life, I can never forget the org-org who ever became my beautiful dream in this world. Without exception he.
What I want to do is maybe not wanted. Because he and I are different, I want to see his wajh with cheerful, I want to listen to his voice, though now will not be with lg.
Now I let two scratches that exist in this heart heal by itself, without me force, without me drugs. I'm sure there will be something beautiful at the end of the story later. Although the fractional injuries can be seen clearly.