I've loved the South, specifically Mississippi and Louisiana almost since I was born... I had visited my family in Kiln, MS every year at least once, and usually it was in the Summer when we could fish, explore, and basically learn how to be a Redneck...
This story is about my first year at University of Southern Mississippi, and the trip home to Philadelphia with a new friend from New Jersey.. It was May 1989, days were long and getting longer, and I was a younger man with not a care in the world...
My first Semester at Univ of Southern Mississippi was finished. Over, Donezo, Finito, The END, and I was jonesing to get back up North to see my friends, and my hot redheaded All American field hockey player... Susan Farrell..
I'd enjoyed my 1st semester away from Pennsylvania in Hattiesburg, MS, and The Kiln very much....
There were homesick moments, and moments I wished I was even further away from PA, but it was a great Semester at USM in the Spring of 1989. It was my first foray into real Independence as a young man, and while I was getting monthly checks from Dad, and had all my tuition and books/meals paid for, I still enjoyed the Autonomy that 1200 miles provided me.
If I wanted to go to the French Quarter @ 11 30 PM with fellow ATO's(Alpha Tau Omega), and make the 2 hr drive to arrive as the real fun was getting under way, so be it.. It was great to be alive, and in the South, but even better to be headed home for the Summer.
I didn't have my own Wheels my first Semester, but my roommate, and 1st cousin, Scott Haas, had a Monte Carlo Super Sport that was fun to ride in back and forth in to USM. I got to drive it every now and then, but Scott knew how to make that 60 mile trip to USM in less than 45 minutes...
This was as close to Dukes of Hazzard as I'll ever get. The Monte Carlo was certainly Scott's General Lee for a long time...
There were so many memories from my Classes, the Fraternity, the Fishing with Scott and Ulmer, and just the joy of getting to see my Mom's side of the family so easily. I loved Kiln, Mississippi for all the right reasons, the great people who lived there, and the fun that was had on the Weekends, and on the River!!
It was a great Semester for a lot of reasons, but mostly because it was OVER!! I'd endured Speech Communication 110 w Richard Conville, and Geography 122(World Geography), and a few other courses that were easy A's. My FINALS completed, it was time to hit the Road.
WAHOOOOO!!
I can still remember the Elation I felt after I took my last Final, and knew I did well. I knew what came next. ROADTRIP!!!
SUMMERTIME in my mind, and I was stoked to be heading home...
I'd done well in the classroom, made a bunch of new friends, pledged a fraternity(ATO), and fallen in love with the South all over again in just a few months.. but I was longing for some real Italian food, and my HS friends, and a few other things... like a Cheesesteak, and real Pizza.
I would miss The Kiln, the Fishing, and a beautiful campus that I loved just seeing everyday... But, I knew I had to be up North for the Summer for sure... I was going to be working in the golf business at Skippack Golf Club, and was looking forward to working outside for the summer.
To me, The South had the best of all worlds... but I needed to get back to Philly at least for 1 last Summer..
There were Pretty Girls, Great fishing, Tasty seafood(Nom Nom), and ton of hospitable, if not downright gracious people at every turn. The South had tons of Culture, History, and very little pressure to do ANYTHING fast.... Just skimming down the Jourdan River heading to Rotten Bayou, or the I 10 Bridge area, or the Shellpile, or Gar Lake seemed to be enough to make me smile wide.
I loved seeing the River, the wildlife, and when the weather was NICE, the Gulf of Mexico, and it's Barrier Islands. I was lucky to have a family, and a cousin that knew a lot about fishing, boating, and all things Jourdan River and Gulf of Mexico.....
I loved my family in the Kiln... including a Grandpa and Grandma Haas, and several Aunt's, and fun cousins (Tommy, Scott, Rick, and Anna)were always a ton of FUN....
I also had a fun Aunt and Uncle in Jackson, Ms, and my cousins, Joey and Jeanie who I enjoyed visiting. They'd lived at Lake Serene in Hattiesburg for a while when David was a Forest Ranger in MS.
Yes, a lot like Ty Webb's character in Caddyshack, who was supposed to be a Firewatcher, my Uncle Dave became a Firewatcher in real life, plus as a bonus, he was a Roman Catholic priest that ultimately fell in love with a Catholic Nun(My Aunt), and they left the Religious Calling, and got married, had kids, and lived happily ever after..
Is this where I mention that I REALLY have a cousin Cletus??!! YES!!
Yes, Cousin Cletus was a fun 2nd or 3rd cousin that moved in with my Uncle Joe and Aunt Jeanie when things got tough around his house, and was basically adopted, and lived with Tommy, Scott, and Ricky till he graduated Southern Miss with a degree in Architecture...
Cletus was/is one of the smarter, and more successful cousins that I have from Kiln, Ms. 39556. Cletus is also one of the funniest, craziest, and fun cousins anyone could have. From his life size posters of Daisy Dukes and Farrah Fawcett, to his usual response to a question that most would scoff at... "Hell.. We can do that!!" in a great Southern Accent... and my cousin Tommy was Cletus' partner in crime...
I guess while I'm at it, it's important to mention that Cletus had a brother named Kyle, but we all called Kyle, "Moss", or "Mossbacker" Why did we call Kyle, "Mossbacker" you might ask.... Simple, he would drag the biggest Bass you'd ever seen out of the Jourdan River system, and surrounding Secret Fishing holes, and some of those Bass were SO OLD, that they were growing Moss on their Backs... and that's why Kyle is now "MOSS".
I guess you can't mention Kiln, MS, without mentioning that Favre Clan that is so near and dear to my heart... I'd met Brett at my Grandma's house a few times, but not till a couple of years later did I get to meet the rest of the Clan, and one in particular that I 've got more Stories and had more Fun with than any.. Jeff Favre..
Suffice it to say, that Jeff Favre is one of the most FUN human beings I know, and when I do get to spend time with him, I try to take off 1 entire day before seeing him, and 2 days after just to recover... Yes, all the Favres are FUN, and super athletic.... but over my time in MS, Jeff was always the one Favre that I got along with best.
My cousin Scott, Jeff and I once when on a 24 hour bender that included Gigging Doormat sized Flounder on a low tide, to running out of bait because we caught so many Speckle Trout, to dragging up a Drum so big out of an Oxbow Lake that we decided NOT to bring it in the Boat, as it might have ruined our day. There will be plenty of time to jot those stories down as well.
{ I think that introduces enough Family for later offerings from the Mississippi Chapters.
All of these family members, and friends will be included in future stories }
I still had to get myself "checked out" by our Resident Advisor, Kevin Donnelly.
I was gonna miss some of my Elam Arms mates, from Doug Shows, Stephen Howell aka Tweety Bird, "Shouders" Dave, and of course, my 1st cousin Scott the Redneck, who was off to Embry Riddle in Prescott, AZ for Aeronautical College.
I didn't have a ton of stuff, and it was a blessing when it came to packing up, and getting my room together.
My roomate, Scott Haas had already said his Goodbyes, and grabbed all of his stuff a couple of days earlier, and headed down south to The Kiln. Scott couldn't wait to get his boat back on the Jourdan River catching Specks and Redfish!!
Scott was a great roommate, and though he is, and was a Redneck of epic proportions at times, he's still one of the smarter Rednecks that I know, if not the smartest Redneck I know. Though he will still run you out of gas a couple of miles out in the Gulf, or in Rotten Bayou on a basic miscalculation... he's good like that. We swam one of his boats in from about 2 miles out once.
I'd enjoyed having the room to myself without Scott around for almost 2 days, and had managed to have some fun with girl in my Speech Communications 110 class. Not to mention getting an Amazing Blowjob from a waitress that I was friends with at Chesterfields as a "Have a great Summer" going away gift... Quite the Bon Voyage present I thought!!
Back to getting myself checked out of my USM Elam Arms Dormitory....
I hurriedly checked my room over, opening the drawers, making sure not to leave a Penthouse, or a Hustler magazine behind by accident. I gave the Bathroom a final once over as well. I theorized at the time that leaving a Hustler in the room by acccident might be enough to blow a USM Band Camp attendee's mind in a few weeks when Band Camp used the Elam Arms Dorms to house Band Camp attendees...
It seemed like I had everything in order in my dorm room!!, I had all of my stuff ready to get picked up by my fraternity brother, Bill Polidore for our Roadtrip home.
So... I headed down to see my RA Kevin, and have him come and inspect my room so I could call Bill, and we could get on the road... It was 11 30 AM on May 4th, 1989.. It was a beautiful mostly sunny day.
Kevin the RA was watching TV with his door open..
I knocked politely, and he beckoned me into his Dorm room.
I asked Kevin if he could inspect my room, and he was up out of his seat before he could say "YES".
Kevin had about 60 students, and 30 dorm rooms to inspect before he could leave for the Summer, so he was eager to get as many rooms inspected as he could. So he could LEAVE!!
Kevin checked everything to see if it worked from toilet, to shower, to sink... and even checked the closet for stray items, and pulled out all the drawers, finding nothing he didn't like....
Kevin Approved my Dorm room, and gave me a High Five and told me to have a great Summer!! APPROVED!!!
I wished him the same. I was a month from being 19 yrs old, and about to head home for the first time since moving to Mississippi.. I was THRILLED!!
YES, I was free to roam about the Country, or at least head towards Philadelphia area with my buddy Billy Polidore. I used the house phone at Elam Arms to call Billy Polidore at the ATO house, and finally I got someone to pick up the phone...
When Billy came to the phone he was like, "Cmon, Let's go, I wanna stop at the China Buffet on the way out of town and put a Hurtin on them Chinks one last time"
So I told him to pick me up at Elam Arms, and let's Make It Happen... when Bill arrived he was thankful that I left a lot of my stuff at my Grandma's house in the Kiln to be used upon my return for school in the late Summer...
I headed down the hall to say Goodbye to Shows and Tweety, and ended up running into Shoulders Dave as well.. all of these guys were great Dorm Mates.
Shows was about 6 ft 5 275 lbs, and never shy about letting people know he was a LOT bigger than them... Tweety, ended up being Sigma Chi President, and Shoulders Dave just kept do 10 sets of Shrugs for every set of everything else... we teased each other about how many girl we were gonna fuck over the Summer, and said our Goodbye's... I was moving out of Elam Arm's in the late Summer and into the ATO House on Fraternity Row... We knew we'd still be friends, but no longer Elam Arms Mates..
High Fives and Hugs ensued, and they helped me get my Stuff out of the back parking lot where Billy Polidore was picking me up...
Bill's 1979 T Bird's backseat and trunk were pretty filled up when he pulled into the Elam Arms Parking lot..... but we found a way to make it work, and head to the China Buffet.
I wasn't big on all things Chinese when it came to food at this point in my tender life.... at age 18 years, and 11 months... but McDonald's was right next door, so I had a decent fall back plan.
Thankfully the China Buffet was quite varied, and I was able to find lots of things that made me and my belly happy before we embarked on our 18 to 20 hours journey home to the Delaware Valley... mostly Shrimp and BBQ ribs.. a little salad, and a lot Coca Cola!!
Bill really did put a final "hurtin" on the China Buffet, putting away 4 or 5 dishes of BBQ ribs, tempura shrimp, and Dumplings and before we knew it we were paying the Tab, and ready to head North on Highway 59!!!
There wasn't anything on the Buffet that was safe from Bill... We paid like $7.95 each for the Buffet, and Bill must have eaten 25 bucks worth... China Buffet would NOT miss Bill being home for the Summer in New Jersey...
Bill had a 1979 Ford Thunderbird that was Dark Midnight Blue, with a Chamois colored Top... and matching Chamois interior... it was 10 years old, and had a lot of miles on it, but it was still a BEAST.... It must have weighed almost 4000 lbs before we put our stuff, and butts in it...
Luckily, gas was reasonably inexpensive in early May 1989... hovering around $1.10 a gallon... The Beast/Thunderbird had a 21 gallon tank, and probably got 15 to 18 miles a gallon, so we had a 300 to 360 mile range. We'd only have to stop 3 times before we rolled into Pennsylvania..
So our first fill up only cost about $15 bucks as we rolled out of the Burg just after lunchtime.
We barreled North on Highway 59 at about 65 to 70 mph... the speed limit at the time was the same highway that runs directly South towards New Orleans, and North towards Laurel, Ms, and Birmingham, Alabama.
Bill Polidore is and was a Hulk of a guy... 6 ft 3, 280 to 300 lbs... and just a Jovial, Gentle Giant.... but you still didn't want him on your Ass about anything..
Billy had a great sense of humor, and he loved to pull pranks on Brothers, including taking a dump in a shoebox and putting it in the back of a brother's Closet for him to find... it took a few days somehow, and ultimately ended up on Bill's Door, but outside of that mischevious side of Bill, he was just a fun guy 24/7, and always ready to help out a brother with a ride, or an idea. True story...
Bill still had an Edge, but he was more likely to laugh and joke, than push people around...
We(Bill) decided that Bill would drive the first few hours, and get me acquainted to the BEAST a bit, and we cruised right through Meridian, MS...and the Air National Guard base with the cool Pre Historic looking helicopters...
One of these helicopters was lifting off, and it was great to see this BEAST in it's own right owning the SKY and headed somewhere on a mission. The heavy LIFT helicopter looked like a Giant Dragonly looking for its next meal. Really cool to watch the helicopters fly around....
It was so EASY to be excited, and wonder what was in store for me in the Summer of 1989.
Bill, myself, and The Beast(79 T Bird) continued on heading Northeast on 59 for a few hours..
We had a soft landing spot at Bill's Great Uncle's house in Gadsden, Alabama for dinner. We left Hattiesburg around 1 pm or so after eating at the China Buffet on Hardy Street, and Gadsden was about 4 hrs from Hattiesburg. So we'd be pulling in just in time to meet Uncle John and enjoy a couple of the best Steaks that Bill and I had ever had.
Bill's Uncle John was a 75 yr old, Mountain Man, who lived in a well appointed, but secluded Cabin just outside of Gadsden up in the hills a bit. Uncle John was one of those Men that didn't seem to need the outside world for much outside of the Mail, and provisions..
Bill had no problem finding Uncle John's house... even w/o cell phones or navigation at the time... Uncle John had given Bill great directions, and before I knew it we were pulling into Uncle John's cabin. The cabin seemed to be surrounded with huge trees as we got out of the Thunderbird to stretch our legs, and knock on Uncle John's door...
Uncle John was expecting us, and came outside a few seconds after we got out of the car, and met us with welcoming handshakes and hugs.. He urged us to come inside before the bugs ate us up, so we followed him inside. Uncle John's house was on the side of a small Mountain, and about as secluded as you could imagine. Nothing but nature seemed to be around Uncle John's house.
John was already working on dinner, and asked us what we wanted to drink...
We opted for Sweet Tea, and then the Stories started coming left and right.
Uncle John was not only a great host and Uncle, but quite a local legend. He had all sorts of stories about the area, hunting and fishing, and regaled Bill and I will plenty of on going stories and explanations of his eclectically decorated Cabin. It seemed that Bill's Uncle was a lot like Bill... Large in Life, and a Classy MFer to boot.
Wow, what a way to start a trip home to PA after freshman year!!
After a few minutes of Uncle John jibber jabbering about how great Billy looked, and how Big Bill had gotten, he excused himself to the kitchen where he would finish up dinner for the three of us... He had the steaks marinating, and a few other items to look after, he told us to watch some TV, and let him know if we needed anything.
The Sweet Tea was never better, and within just 25 minutes or so, Uncle John rang a bell of some sort in the Kitchen... and it wasn't a big secret that the Steaks were done... and dinner was about to be served.. YUM!!! It smelled so good, of Garlic, and Onions, and caramelizing Beef...
Uncle John had 3 beautiful Ribeye steaks for the 3 of us, and he seared them off well, and finished them off by basting them in Garlic, Onions, Butter and cracked pepper... Delicious!!
The Steaks were cooked a perfect Medium, not too rare, or too done, just Right.
Uncle John had also made some wild rice, and had a Salad and some Buttered Corn, not to mention some Warm Rolls that he'd bought at the Gadsden Market earlier in the day. What a spread, and it was just what Billy and I needed after 4.5 hours of driving from The Burg!!
As soon as the Steaks hit the Dinnertable, the chit chat was pretty much done....,
It was time for me, Bill,and Uncle John to MEAL DOWN... on these beautiful pieces of meat, rice, and corn.
Dinner was so good, it had Uncle John offering to have us stay the night, and restart our journey in the morning... but We were determined to get down the Road towards PA/NJ before long. Maybe after Dessert. Even though Uncle John told us not to help him clean off the table, we helped him anyway.
The table was clean in no time, and Uncle John told us to sit back down, and that he had 1 more surprise for us, before we could get on our way. He could tell we were rearing to get North as fast as possible... John brought out an Apple Pie, and a gallon of Vanilla Ice Cream.. The Pie was hot, and the Vanilla Ice Cream was it's perfect Foil... What a way to end our time in Gadsden, Alabama.
Before we knew it, we were outside Uncle John's house, and it was around 745 pm... there was still a little bit of light left, but not much, especially where Uncle John's house was located on the small mountainside. John wished us Safe Passage, and told Bill to call him when he got up North safe and sound... and that was that... 4.5 hours down on the trip, a great Detour in Gadsden, Alabama to see Bill's Uncle, and a meal to remember for a lifetime!! BOOM!!
I topped off Bill's tank for him at the local Gas Station in Gadsden that was right off of Highway 59, and we headed North.. again!!
Back on the road, we got into a rhythm pretty quick at about 65 mph. We knew it wasn't really a Race, but a fun, long Cruise to some great tunes.... The T Bird could go a lot faster, but it liked to cruise between 60 and 75 for the most part. Billy continued driving and told me that I would take the late night portion.... which was fine with me. My adrenaline seemed to pump more and more the closer we got to the Mason Dixon line...
Somewhere around 1030 pm and having changed highways from Highway 59, to Highway 75, and now were on Highway 81 which would take us right into PA near Harrisburg... where we could take the turnpike into the Philadelphia area.. We stopped for gas, and was my turn to take turns guiding the BEAST down Highway 81...
We grabbed a few caffeinated drinks, filled the Beast's Tank, and grabbed a few snacks...
It looked to me like Bill was getting a bit weary, so I knew that most of the night I would be alone with the Beast, while Bill snoozed after driving about 9 hours since Noon... I welcomed the Late Night drive through Virginia, that would end with the Sun coming up in Northern Va....
I drove that Beast like a Limousine, just a smooth long ride with some great tunes on the Radio.... whether it was the newish Fine Young Cannibals, Bobby Brown, and all the late 80's tunes over the Waves... Midnight came and went, as did 1 AM, 2 AM, and 3 AM... Billy slept through most of the night...
We had enough gas to drive till about 430 AM... when the tank got to looking a little too empty, I pulled off Interstate 81 and into a 24/7 Truckstop and Gas Station... Very few people are up at 430 AM, except Truckers and Tweakers as far as I could tell.. at least that's all that were at the Truckstop that night.
Billy woke up, and stretched a bit, and got vertical saying he slept great, and THANKS for driving so smoothly... he said he got LOTS of rest, and would be ready to take the wheel back for the final stretch in Maryland...
I grabbed another Coke, and a Caramello candybar, and we both piled back into the Beast for another 7 to 8 hours of driving... we were way over half way home, and though TIRED, the adrenalin of seeing old friends and family soon buoyed our Reserves...
It was still dark out, but at 5 AM, it wouldn't be dark out for very long... Bill was back to sleep in 15 minutes, and I find a radio station play a Block of Billy Joe... Allentown, Piano Man, New York State of Mind... all of the greats... I didn't see out loud, but enjoyed the tunes as much as I could without waking up Billy...
The sun came out around 6 AM, and hid behind the mountainous and hilly region of VA that we were now traveling through on Highway 81. Around 7 30, I pulled off the Interstate as Bill asked me to do, we hit a McD's drive through for Egg McMuffins, and hashbrowns... YUMMY!!
Now, Bill had rested some 7 or 8 hours, and he was back at the Helm of the BEAST!! WE cruised through VA, which seemed like it was never endling, and by 930 we were in Maryland, and getting close to the PA border, though we were still 150 miles or so from my house in Plymouth Meeting, PA.
We got on the turnpike around where Highway 81 hit the PA turnpike, and made our final turn for Home!! Those 2 hours crept the slowest of the entire trip, but once I started recognizing landmarks as we got closer, and closer the excitement grew. Oh to be 19 again, and headed into my sophomore year!!
We paid the Toll, and got on Germantown Pike headed West, and started passing all the landmarks I missed.. The Mall, Plymouth Park and Basketball Courts, the Valley, soon we turned on Sheffield Drive headed toward my house... a left turn at Knoll Road, and I was just on the road I grew up on... 1 minute later we pulled into my driveway, Chestnut Hollow as my house was called then, and I WAS HOME!!
WOW,, what a trip...
My brother came outside to greet us, but my Mom and Dad were at my Dad's office... We unpacked my stuff from the BEAST, and I yelled over at OATMAN and Matty Pig(my neighbors) who were peeking their heads out to see me being home....
It was good to be home, and I could only imagine where my Summer would go... I was carless, jobless, but had a hot Redhead that was glad to have me back in town... So Life was Good!!
The entire Summer was in front of me.. What to do first... NAP!!!
U gotta love STEEM!!! Build the community, and it will benefit everyone....
ElGatoHombre
Interesting post. I am a USM alumnus from the 50s if you can believe that.
YAY!! I will follow you, and want to hear about your experience at USM.. was it USM then, or Mississippi Southern... I was an ATO at USM... enjoyed my time in Hburg very much.. Where do you live now? Let's definitely keep in touch, and when you post something, I will upvote it, and help you market your Steem profile.. All the Best.. Chris Cat
Ruh Rah Rega, fellow brother! Let the Good times roll! Love&Respect!
Ah yes, all the wonderful things you describe about Southern Miss and South Mississippi are what many people should get to experince but may never get the chance. Great article and as a Southern Miss grad (I was there from 82 - 87 and back in 90 to get a masters) I was lucky enough to get to experience the the amazing and wonderful people at Southern Miss. SMTTT!