I had my first heartbreak when I was in College during my sophomore year. I met this bachelor who I thought was the man of my dreams, he is cool; a scuba diver/master instructor who's half Spanish & half Filipino, plays ukulele so well, and drives a cool big bike in town. I fell in love so hard with this guy probably because he was the man I've always imagined to be with. He treated me right, made me feel special, and took care of me when I needed to be.
Everything was perfect, until time came when everything came crashing down and I started doubting and asking myself.. Am I not good enough? Am I not cool enough? Why can't we just live happily ever after? Why can't we be together? Why can't he love me? I broke down so hard, and it almost ruined myself.
Few months of moving on and forgetting, there was this military pilot who came and made me fall in love again with his sense of humor and cheesy ways. He was goofy and romantic, and he made a beautiful distraction. Months of dating, I thought I finally moved on and I was ready again to give my all. I thought this military pilot is finally the one who's gonna be with me to solve the puzzle of life and made it to the end of the maze. However, no matter how you thought that things are in place again and perfect, life taps you in the back and show you it isn't.
My Aunt who treated me like her own daughter and taught me a lot of things that would help me reach my dreams, died because of cancer. And incidentally, I found out a lot of horrible stuff about this military pilot that broke me so much. I was in a very difficult situation. It was a very difficult situation for me.
Three big heartbreak in a year, how can it get any better?
Time came when I decided to do things that would distract me from all the pain that I was feeling, things that will help me to forget about them and the experiences, just to forget about the pain. But those things wasn't enough, at the end of the day whenever I am alone, pain and emotions knocks on my door and forcefully goes in and attacks me.
It was the worst year of my life until I decided to make everything right again.
I began traveling, backpacking, meeting different people, making new friends, and learning new sports which are packed with adrenaline rush.
I went to the places which are people and life friendly, I learned how to live simply and find genuine happiness in simplest ways.
I embraced freedom, I laughed so hard until my tummy aches, I went to the extremes, and lived like there's no tomorrow.
From hiking mountains to surfing waves and exploring the unknown, I realized what life is really about and how I should live it. I found myself, went on with my life and did what I must to reach my goals and dreams. I moved on. I healed myself, but never forgot what happened.
It took me years but I realized that life is beautiful not just because it is a sunny day and the sea is serene, sometimes a wave to surf on while it rains is way more better than anything else.
Sometimes pain is not always gonna break you down, sometimes it builds you up for you to be stronger and for a better tomorrow with someone who you deserve, and will love you the way you want to be loved. Travelling gave me hope and courage to move on with my life and get the things that I deserve.
Today, I am with someone who is so special to me and I love the most. Fortunately, he dearly loves me too. And for so many reasons, I will always be proud of him!.. and thankful that he came and adds meaning, color and adventure to my life.
Though life is getting a bit rough, everyday, together we get stronger and better. Life is good and beautiful, especially if it is spent with people who knows your worth and finds you just amazingly beautiful.
