I've never enjoyed international commutes. They are long, bothersome, crowded and wasteful. But since I've started identifying as gender non-binary, it's worse.
Constant reminders
During my travel from Israel to the UK yesterday, I had to mark my sex 4 times. Yes, sex, not gender, but somehow that isn't comforting at all. This was also the first time I felt bad about going into the male restrooms. It's just a constant reminder of how the world doesn't accept me for who I am.
The unfamiliar
Traveling abroad means going to an unfamiliar place, with unfamiliar people and an unfamiliar culture. It means I don't know what kind of reactions to expect from people for presenting as feminine, or genderqueer.
At home I could slowly explore people's reactions, learn them, learn to deal with them. Dropping into an unfamiliar place is scary.
So I minimize it. Aside from my nail polish, which I decided to keep this time, I'm hiding my feminine traits. Am I going into a closet, after not ever being in one?
I'll be flying to Japan in May, and I feel even worse about that. I'm likely going to cut my nails short when I go there. I don't want the extra attention.
The good stuff
And just to end on a more fun note, after all, I am on vacation, and I'm not actually sitting here moping like the tone of this post suggests.
Got on a train to the airport. Commute was fine. Got to the airport. Flying British Airways, which means shorter lines than El Al, and quicker check in. Got to the duty free in about 45 minutes. Also didn't do the 3 hours ahead of time thing, so barely had to wait for boarding.
I took a bunch of selfies on the way, at @techslut's request. You know what bothers me? I'm wearing the same shirt in all of them. How silly is that?
British Airways flights are usually really nice, and this flight was no exception. The only problem was this huge hunk of metal cutting down on my leg room.
It turned out not to be so bad for the legs, but just not leaving me room for my bag on the floor, so had to stow it. Accidentally dropped a water bottle on someone's head while doing so. Sorry someone.
Pro Tip: If you want to get your meal early, order a special meal. I ordered a hindu one, which was vegeterian and quite nice.
Generally asking for something special, weird as it sounds, gets you better service. I asked the stewardess for ginger ale. She was super nice. Said she has some but not in the cart, she'll go get me some, and even offered to bring me two. Then insisted on giving me something from the cart in the meantime. Sparkling water it is.
I get to the UK, everything goes smoothly, though I lose the luggage roulette and reclaim mine fairly late. Mom picks me up from the airport. Ya, I'm visiting my mom, who lives in the UK since I was 16.
She said she made indian food, but thought I probably won't be hungry, and also cake. So she said we can have cake with tea.
I just landed in the UK though, I'm thinking, pub!
Me: We can drop the stuff at the house, and head to the pub for a beer.
Mom: Ah, well, we might have to drive there.
Me: What, no neighborhood pub?
Mom: No. Need to drive to one. Or walk 10-15 minutes.
Me: Disaster! A house in the middle of Oxford with no neighborhood pub!
...
We decide to walk to the pub. It was maybe a 6 minute walk.
Different definitions of what a neighborhood pub is, I guess.
Anyway, at the pub they have changing taps, and they have little clear jars with the beers in front of the tap so you can see their color. Real neat.
I tried half a pint of a local brew, which was super cheap, like 1.5 pounds. And also had a pint of blue moon. Blue moon was better, but not by a lot.
Theres gotta be some gncs or gf folks in japan!! The land of cute!!?!?!
-Limabeing
Definitely. But we've watched Gaycation: Japan, and that doesn't paint a pretty picture.
Ugh, that's so frustrating. I'm sorry that you have to deal with that. I hope that those things will change over the coming years as awareness spreads, not just at home but internationally as well.
Also, El Al has some of the best vegetarian airplane food I've ever had.
Have a great time , one of the countries I like the most. This is The first time I noticed your nails, cool, how do you not bite them?
I'm always aware of them and guard them. I only used to bite them because I was too lazy to use trimmers.
friend do not worry this happens everywhere the important thing is to travel, to know, share and enjoy the moment during the stay in those countries my dear and most important of all is that one has to be original
regards
After reading this, I wish you could just take a trip to Nigeria, I am also a traveler just as you and I respect you for your gender choice. Africa is waiting for @poet
Every time a form has the field "sex" in it, I get the urge to add the answer "yes please".
I used to, but now I just feel oppressed.
I know. Our world is full of micro-oppressions. We tolerate them. Sometimes we're forced to internalize some because "it's just how it is". But we choose which. What we can change - we try. What we cannot - we complain about and tolerate. Because we must.