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Dear #ulog,
This is not the usual piece of poetry that I am known by, neither is it in the familiar banter-like tone I use on most of my blogs. But this is the ardent outpouring of my hurting heart, the endless flowing stream of my aching tears. It is penned in agony and in writhing pain.This is life, my life. Please take time to read and save my soul.
This night weighs heavily inside me and I seek to let it all out, perhaps find a sort of soothing, an emollient, or outright healing .
And what better outlet for me to explode, if not #ulog?
When will the hot tears cease flowing? When will memories cease creeping in on me at the slightest opportunity? Why do these memories devour the rays of light inside of me? When will they stop their torment?
I am a bundle of nerves right now.
My ex-husband came into town today !
No big deal, but the big deal is : He has never sought out the family he abandoned over 10 years ago. The family he left for the arms of another. He has never bothered about the lovely kids we had together. He cares less that he could walk by without being able to recognize his own children. What colour of blood could run in such veins?
What kind of cruelty could power such a heart? Why would he not look back on memories? Why would his 'love' hurt so bad?
Miracle and Eden were eight and six respectively the last time he saw them. A time that he hurt them so bad. And uptil now, he still has not deemed it necessary to make amends.
I weep for what he has done to them, to us and I keep praying that their pain will distinguish rather than embitter them. But I want him to know that he has lost out. Look at the lovely kids he deserted. He wasn't there when they learnt new tricks. He wasn't there when they won trophies in school. He wasn't there when they cried. He wasn't there when they laughed. They make me proud. They make me forget how 'love' hurt me so deeply and they replace every distress with utmost devotion and affection. He has lost chunks of their lives so valuable, so indelible in my heart and I hope he doesn't realize this so so late.
My 'Miracle'
My 'Eden'
These are my jewels, my pearls, my treasures and the 'apple of my eyes'
I feel much better now. I will hide my sadness in the depth of the night and when the Sun dawns, my smile will glitter again.
Thank you @ulog for reading.
Dedicating my entire steemit journey to Terry Ajayi, aka @surpassinggoogle
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THANK YOU FOR STOPPING BY MY NEIGHBOURHOOD ❤
Thanks for sharing your feelings. I hope your happiness will be back soon.Life is about both happiness and sadness.So, don't be so much upset.
Thank you very much that you care. I appreciate
This is heart touching and melancholy...
I say an Amen to that Ma. And they should use the pain as a drive. They should be strong because they have you.
You are indeed a great mom, cause to me I can see you are doing well despite he left. You didn't crumble. Keep giving them a reason to be thankful to God for giving them you. You would be glad you did..
Uchenna your words are like music to my ears. My patched soul is so grateful that you quenched its thirst. I appreciate you so greatly. Thank you.
My night is been made with this ma...
Thanks a million times...
Thanks for pouring your heart out so authentically on the blockchain, it's not often people are vulnerable and I think it is an incredible strength. I'm glad writing it out helped ease the burden of feelings a bit. I can only imagine how much anger and sadness you would feel at this outrageous behaviour!
All I can think of are very rude things to say about your ex, so I will plead the 5th instead...
My Lyndsey, I can envision you reading and swearing 'what the ***k is this crap? Hahaha.... My sister, it is crap alright, and you can swear all you want, your right to express, at this craziness and cruelty because you will always speak for the truth and the highest good. Thank you for being there for me. I feel better now.
It's okey to feel pain @edith4angelseu. Pain is part of life so it's okey to feel these things. Just believe that after pain, happiness are coming to your life. Instead use that pain to inspired you to achieve what you want in life. I'm wishing for your happiness friend.
Awww..... So sweet of you. Thank you for this great comment. You just made my day
Your always welcome dear. Just don't forget to smile always.
@edith4angelseu postingan anda sangat menarik dan @surpassinggoogle dengan semangat meninggal suara di posting anda.
I feel that perhaps you are empathizing with me. Thank you
You can share you sadness here. When you share you will feel better. I hope your life is better since now
I am much better dear, thank you
I hope you are very happy this moment ...
Yes I am. Thank you for caring.
Your kids are lovely Ma'am. Sometimes it just good to pour your heart out. May God continue to strenghten you.
Thank you so much
Very nice of you sharing this with us here @edith4angelseu and keep on the good work @surpassinggoogle
Thank you so much
I have a experience with my lover.😴
Oh! So sorry about that.