A Trip to Self Reconciliation
There are some times that I needed to re think of what life really means to me. Especially when I am on the edge of emptiness.
Sometimes, I would not mind being eaten up by any of this dark pit. Maybe I thought no matter what happen, or no matter how hard you’ll fight, there’s no way out of that lurk. But not this time.
Sunday, yesterday. I was so anxious and don’t know who to talk to or where to go. I was so empty and thought needed some time to regain myself.
And with most of the miracles that happened to my life, I let myself walk somewhere I know will save me.
I went again to the Philippine National Museum (Fine Arts) to reconcile with myself and relearn why I needed to go on.
Maybe with all the Learnings I’ve regain, below are my favorites:
LESSON 1
There's always chaos in everything. And sometimes, it's what only mattered to us.
Most of the time we forgot that there's always Love too. That Love is a wisdom of understandings and peace. A tender affective feeling and infinite learnings.
But sometimes, concepts are not enough without application
LESSON 2
Some of us are arts we choose not to finish yet.
Most artists are procastinators. It's a cage...Somehow.
It's a wonderful paradox that we are free, but we don't always want it.
LESSON 3
Life is a mess, but it doesn't mean it is not beautiful.
LESSON 4
If you have moved over a problem, always get ready for worse. We are meant to be stronger each and every day.
LESSON 5
Life is like a pencil. You are writing all your life until you think you lose your point .. and so you have to sharp it again, and eventually write again, for more.
Sometimes you will fail, but you will always have enough eraser in the process, not to unwrite those mistakes, but to make the story better.
But, most importantly never stop writing. Because before you'll know it, the life you thought was pointless is your story and it is all about your point, from the beginning until you lose everything.
Your sheet might look messy, but it will never mean it is not beautiful.
LESSON 6
No matter how strong you became, Life has always its ways to bring you down if it supposed you deserve it. Or the other way, regardless of you being weak, being strong, being rich, or whatever being you are.
I think
Keeping myself busy and pretending to be strong helps me cope from anxieties and pressures, but the thought of this also helped me to realize, sometimes being weak is not totally letting go, sometimes, I think it is a prerequisite for regaining strength and recollecting yourself from the depth you buried your realness with all your prentendings and fantasies of being invulnerable.
Most of the time that we felt scroutching our backs, leaning our shoulders somewhere or even we felt like kneeing and bowing down, I think we should always do ourselves a favor to do it. Because maybe, we just needs rest and colors to know we’re not just existing but we are living and we’ve got more purpose, each and everyday.
It is not everything. But the rest will be in your heart's desire to be learned. :)
Thank you for Reading! Please let me know what you think!
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