Dear Cable Guy.....

in #ulog6 years ago

Regarding your surprise visit yesterday, I have a few thoughts.

  1. I know you didn't realize this, but I have a rule about answering the door when I'm home alone.

I don't.

Unless you call me first.

And if you don't have our phone number, that means you probably don't need it and therefore don't need to come over.

The exceptions to this rule are as follows:

A: Ed McMahon rings the bell but he must have a very hefty check in his hands. The fact that he is dead would make this prospect quite creepy and therefore I'd probably no longer open my door to him.

B: Relatives. Nuff said.

C: Girl Scouts. But they MUST have cookies in hand AND have one of those credit card swipey thingy's.

D: Jesus. I think this goes without saying, but I'd say it'd be bad karma to not invite our Lord and Savior into your home if He paid you a visit.

  1. It's interesting to me that you came to our door to inquire about cable because we don't have it. See, we just paid up the nose for feline dental surgery for our 13-year-old cat (so far up the nose in fact, that I'm pretty sure they touched brain matter. After all that, you think we have money for cable?

We don't. But I admire your optimism.

  1. I'm so confused as to why you just randomly showed up at our house. I mean, there are SO many people who actually have cable in our city but when it goes out, they call the cable company and wait for days for them to MAYBE show up. And you just showed up to my house, uninvited?

Props to you.

So, yeah. I guess that's it. I do promise though that if we ever win the lottery and decide to install cable, you will be the first place we call.