Let's start off with a little poem:
The Guest House
This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.
Be grateful for whatever comes.
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.
— Jellaludin Rumi,
translation by Coleman Barks
This is one of my favorite poems. I shared it a while ago and quite a few of you commented on it.
The thoughts I share in this vlog were ones I have been thinking of often and it struck me in a new way today.
So often, we resist, deny, suppress or ignore the "less fun or joyful emotions". Many of us were taught to "always put our best face forward" and "be happy", "smile!"... There's nothing wrong with this inherently, but it can lead to a lack of understanding or inability to handle when other emotions come our way, as they necessarily will!
Anger, sadness, fear, depression, anxiety... these all come to us at different times and yet many of us aren't taught how to relate to them. Oftentimes we're told it's bad to feel this way and so it's natural to want to push these emotions away.
For a while now, I've been practicing loving these emotions and accepting them.
I find that when we do this, the emotions do their work in us and move on. If we fight or ignore them, they can become trapped in the body, come out in other ways through other behaviors, etc, or we can become numb to all experiences of emotion.
Not accepting these other "harder emotions" greatly limits our experience here. These aren't emotions to strive to never have, but ones to be embraced for their unique messages as the poem above articulates so well. I find if I relate to them in this way, there's a gentler sense with myself, I have more self love and acceptance instead of hating these very emotions that need me to see them.
When your friend feels sad, would you tell him to bug off? Perhaps not, so why when we feel sad do we push it down? Same goes for all of these "less comfortable" emotions than happiness, bliss, joy, etc. It's definitely a practice to learn to accept and hear these emotions and allow them to move on in their time, but one that is worth the time and effort.
How can we say to ourselves?
I only love you when?
Our love is not scarce and comes from an infinite wellspring within, that is the God(dess) within us. So why not shower love on all these parts of ourselves?
I'm curious to hear your thoughts & experience on this. Feel free to leave them below! Let's have a conversation! Thanks for watching/reading!
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I absolutely love what you say! My heart feels it completely. I struggle. I am very unkind to myself while showing all others with love, patience and acceptance. Peeling the layers back, ripping open wounds and healing all the things I have long since buried has been terribly difficult. The journey is not easy but the rewards are ... profound, exquisite, remarkable, uplifting ( I can't think of a suitable word).
So glad to know you felt this in your heart! So thankful to hear of your deep work that you’re settling into. It’s not always an easy journey, but as you say; one that is so worth it. Here’s wishing you gentleness for yourself and kindness most of all as you dig deep for those treasures and continue on your path of self love! We’re all rooting you on (and there with you in our own journeys of loving ourselves more!!) 💙
So beautiful and so true with many of us. I know I too am guilty of pressing away those icky feelings....you are right to honor all feelings and live through them. Thank you for this beautiful post @mountainjewel
💕💕💕💕it’s such a practice to allow, see and then love and accept those parts, too 💚🌿
First off, thanks for taking us along to the beach!
Next, loving those parts of me that I feel are unlovable is one of my biggest struggles. For example, hubby & I had three BIG babies (over 10lbs each) and my stomach is now flabby and covered in stretch marks. One time in particular, I pushed hubby's hand away as he tried to rub my stomach, telling him I was self-conscious about it because it was so unattractive. He said, "How could something that gave me three beautiful babies be anything but beautiful?" Yeah, he's a keeper.
Thanks for the reminder that I need to work on that a bit more. Bright blessings to you!
I am so glad that your husband filled you up with love where your own self love needed boosting. It’s so wonderful when others can assist us in those ways and essentially forge the pathways! Def a keeper! So glad this post inspired you further along the path of self love 😊💕
Agreed, and the trick is (again, something I'm working on) letting them help you. I find it's much easier to wave off the compliment love, then to say, "thank you, I appreciate it." Gotta practice a bit more...LOL
Thank you again for your positive vibe! 😊
this is beautiful! I am so glad that you are delving into self development in your posts. I guess you have been a while/forever, but I hadn't noted that is what it is. I remember knowing you in person that was one treasure of you, your loving nature. We all got a name related to a letter of our name, and you were called Lovingly as your first part of the name. Remember that? Anyway, I think this is one of the most important messages I have ever heard, though a little later than it might have been useful in this past rough bit I had. Thank you so much for being so loving of your heavy hard emotions as well as everything that is pleasant. It is how you come into the world, an admirable trait, and something I want to glean.
what a good memory. thanks maggie!
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Our love is definitely not scarce; it is quite abundant only if we realize that. This love increases when we spread it far and wide and for that, we need to start with ourselves. Thank you for this beautiful reminder! God bless you both.