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'No rain is expected today.' Then why are the puddles outside my door geting larger by the minute?

Ahahaha. And when you tell someone, they won't believe you. Brilliant.

From what I've seen it's not due until later. Surely you know how fickle the British weather can be. Do you think the forecasters are messing with you?
Have a good day anyway.

I honestly think the Met Office would be better at forecasting with some pine cones on the windowsill and Mrs Miggins looking out the front door every morning.

I hope you compliment them when they get it right.

Do you have one of these? https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Weather_rock

ROTFLMAO

Get me one for Christmas!