Women's History Month intends to honor, inspire, educate, unite and promote women in the face of forces intent on subjugating and silencing them. It is about those who overcame overt and imbedded assumptions and prejudice to be their best selves. RGB said it well:
“I ask no favor for my sex. All I ask of our brethren is that they take their feet off our necks.”
DAY 4: SISTER CAROL
(Her photo from my high school yearbook)
Sister Carol, like my Aunt Anna from Day 1, is another example of a person that would be hard to find with a browser search, but a giant force at the right time on my life.
I was a spoiled, lazy kid growing up. Spoiled because I was the only boy in a Germanic family that bestowed such honors (and because I deserved it 😂), and possibly because I almost died as an infant. Lazy because I was allowed to be. I would go as far as skills and intuition would take me, then quit if I was actually challenged to learn something difficult. I was extolled for the things I did well, and given hall passes for the other stuff. Later in life, I discovered there were other elements at play, namely the genetics that made me a scatter-brain, my split persona, and mild ADHD.
The first adult that I can recall who decided not to accept this, without understanding the causes, was my sixth grade teacher. He chose to beat me into submission with one use of a wood paddle, because that’s how it was done then.
The second took a tough love approach, and it stuck. Sister Carol was my 10th grade English teacher. She held me accountable at a sustained level, while introducing me to poetry and creative writing. The latter had never been nurtured before. My immigrant parents used English in a functional capacity, and that acceptably dovetailed into what I described above quite nicely. My father’s aspirations for me were to find a good job working for someone who would financially reward me, and that I’d be happy with that.
Sister Carol extracted more out of me in that one semester than anyone ever had by demanding my best while offering support and encouragement. This approach resonated with me, and my abilities grew from their abysmal state. At an age where I just wanted to disappear into the shadows, she gave me a light that let me be there comfortably, and to find my way back once I was ready.
A year later, when I took the SAT test, I scored an extremely high score in the mathematics section and horribly in the language section. But Sister Carol had instilled hope that I could do better, and the means to achieve that. What I learned from her was foundational for my career and in life. I chose to carry her love forward by mentoring and tutoring others, a rewarding activity of mine for over 30 years and counting.
I've always been a lifelong learner, exploring one or more side interests almost every year to keep my curious mind fresh. At age 60, that challenge was creative writing, with the intent of publishing. Backed by the foundations she helped establish in me, I've crept my way into the writing world, and hope to publish my first book this year.
I didn’t thank her nearly enough for everything she did for me, but we did keep in touch until she passed. Just hearing her voice and joyous enthusiasm was enough to keep me trying to be my best self.
Thank you, dear sister.
#womenwhoinspireme
#womenshistorymonth
#creativeworkhour
#CWH
#SisterCarol