Have you ever been in a position where you don't know if you are foolish or if it's just love? Have you ever sat down to think, or advice yourself to take things slow, probably you feel you're on a fast lane and might hit a wall? Have you ever thought of quitting on someone because it feels right and trying to hold on is just as frustrating as using a stick to eat spaghetti for the first time?
If you fall under any of the above mentioned category, or you are anyone of the person mentioned above, then this post is for you. So I'll advice that you sit and read till the end. This is not a series, but might have other parts apart from this one.
I know a guy who was in love with a lady, he could forfeit sleep for her, he could even take a bullet for her if need be. He was so dedicated to keeping her happy that he forgot he had a life to live also. Of course, she got used to him being a fool for her and took it as a right and saw it as an obligation for him to be loyal to her. It got to her head and she began to misbehave. She would get angry at him for no reason and would want him to come and beg her with so many things before she would consider him. sometimes, he went with his friends or to hers to plead on his behalf. He was used to it and did that for three (3) years before she dumped him. She got tired of seeing his face. She wanted a man, not one who would breakdown the moment she threatens that she is leaving him
Be careful what you wish for.
Be careful also how you invest.
I also know a guy who had one serious girl he was dating. He showed her the world, for he was financially capable and equal to the task. In this part of the world, you have to be rich to be romantic, because your money alone makes you sexy or hot. He took her around and showed his friends his girl. as a matter of fact, he was flaunting her, for she was beautiful no doubt. He would brag to his friends that his girlfriend was the only loyal girl he a had seen in his life ever. He even argued that she was still a virgin and he had not even gotten the chance of exploring her hidden treasures. He always had her with him anywhere he went then like his lapdog.
One day, I saw him with a rope walking out of the compound into the bush, answering no greeting and looking very pale. I had to follow him for he had not been himself since he learnt that his girlfriend was pregnant. He was angry and learnt later that his best friend was the one responsible. He carried the rope and located a strong tree, climbed while i watched from a distance so I won't interrupt at first. He just tied the rope to the tree, sighed and came down holding the rope to support himself down the tree. He was depressed and felt he was being watched, so he shifted his plan for another day.
Nothing is what they seem
There is this other guy who had three girlfriends and all three girls loved him. They all knew he was a player and hoped he would change and become a better person. He had one of the girls in his house and another called that she was coming around. He quickly dismissed the one he was with and welcomed the other one coming. He was smart in his own context, but was a child and living like one. He had the second one leave the moment he got pissed of by her jokes and called for the third girl immediately.
Yeah did I hear you say all men are scum?
We all have our side of the story
If you keenly followed those stories, you will see that there is one in which opportunity was misused. The second was a case of misplaced trust and betrayal. While the third was one of recklessness and greed.
Many people will be quick to blame the third guy and will readily call him names and ascribe all sorts of bad character to him. But if you are open minded, you will see that situations or scenario would carve that last guy into what he has become. Imagine loving someone who does not love you in return, and because they tell you true love is not one sided, and it is not expecting to receive at the other end, but is that of selflessness. That I don't would work when it comes to relationships. The first girl is likely to become a poorly informed feminist, who would always want to attack men and not want a peaceful cohabitation. This is because she would forget the chivalry of the first guy she played. She would not remember unless something triggers her mind. She would readily say all men are the same, that all men are good for nothing, scum and so on. This is because the guy she met later, would lie to her. He would tell her to wait somewhere while he meets his friends and would introduce her as his friends when he is with his female friends. Gradually, she lost value and her patience diminished.
The other guy started contemplating suicide the moment his lover betrayed his trust with his best friend. She knew he loved her and would go any length to make her happy. He felt he had the money and nothing would make his angel leave him for another man.
The guy who had 3 girls and changes them like wrapper was the first and second guy. He was first blindly in love and would go extra miles for her, until she let out the cat and went away still. If you try to advice him after he went into a second relationship with fresh mind and hope that making money could keep a girl. He lost her to his best friend who was not half as rich as he was.
So if you want to venture into a relation, have the right reason or motive.
My name is Chidi John and I want to say adios.
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