Today my 10 year old asked me, "Can you get arrested for throwing a snowball at a police officer?"
Without thinking really, (as I am generally very direct with my kids), I replied:
"I guess it depends on the police officer." Shrugging, I told him "If the officer is nice and understanding then he mostly likely will laugh it off. But if he was hurt by or simply doesn't like snowballs thrown at him, then you could most certainly be arrested. Assault on a police officer is taken very seriously, hun."
He looked back at me with skepticism. He crunched his little eyebrows and firmed his mouth into a straight line. "That doesn't make sense Mom. I thought you could only be arrested if you broke the law. Either it's against the law or it's not. How can a policeman decide the law on the spot like that?"
This is where I start to get nervous. It’s one of those parent-moments you cringe at. You try to teach your kids compassion, respect, and honesty but at some point they mature and realize how the world really works.
The Law is not black and white but how to explain this to a 10 year old?
The last thing I want is my boy to be afraid of police officers or afraid to question the world - But it seems like you can’t have both in today’s world.
Like I said, I do my best not to lie to my kids. I don’t sugarcoat reality and I refuse to see the world through rose colored glasses just because I have children. Sure I want to believe the world will change for the better, that my kids will inherit a planet full of happy people, abundant natural resources and a thriving economy but c’mon people. If you don’t introduce your kids to the truth, someone else will and then they’ll be looking back at you wondering how you lied to them for 20 years.
“One thing I want you to know son, above all else, is that yes, the police can decide the law on the spot, just like that. Cops can handle a problem however they want and a judge will almost always agree with the police afterwards.”
“That’s not fair, Mom.”
This is where my father would throw the ‘Well, Life’s not fair’ line at me. I hated that line, and I still do. Life IS fair. You get what you put into it and what you give out always, always comes back to you. The way society is set up is not fair, those who rule the world are not fair but Life is fair. Life is so much more than countries, governments, policies.
“You’re right. It isn’t fair.” I think he was expecting a different reply from me and in all honesty I wanted to say more but how do I teach my 10 year old to stay on the “right side” of The Law? How do I teach him to put his hands up?
Parental love is a weird emotion. It makes me go against instinct sometimes. I believe in human rights. I am completely and openly against all of the major societal systems out there from public education to politics. I myself view the police as America’s most largest, most successful gang ever (other than the IRS). I want revolution.
But the risk of having to identify his body one day…
shuts that shit down so quick.
I want to instill power into him but he is about to hit the age where defiance creeps in, where authoritative figures become menacing micro-managers. There is no forgiveness for children in the judicial systems anymore.
Perfect example; last year he made a comment to a friend in the bathroom. They were complaining about school and he said he wanted to burn the school down. Now, they were overheard - the school hit the roof. He had his person, locker and bag searched. Obviously he didn’t have gasoline and matches in his locker. He was suspended and had to submit to searches on his return to school! A 9 year old kid, who’d never previously been in that kind of trouble, never been sent home or suspended EVER.
Ridiculous.
But case and point. Something not even serious, gets warped into a dangerous situation. It’s like they are trying to create fear. I see it everywhere lately.
Individual offenses are blown out of proportion because it generates profits, yet the police, politicians, government officials blatantly act as if they are above the law. They are getting with it, too! We have them on video, we have the bruises, we’ve been hit with the charges and done the time. They murdered countless civilians, beaten mothers, children, disabled people, elders -and they get away with it! A paid leave of absence? I couldn’t even get paid maternity leave.
Parental love kicks in again and I feel a deep desire to shield him from all this. To keep him safe, keep him hidden.
Make sure he never goes downtown with his buddies wearing a hoodie or plays with water guns at the park.
How do I tell him to never run, never keep your hands in your pockets, never wear a hat or hood?
Never intervene if you see a cop arresting someone? Don’t even make eye contact with cops. Never take ANYTHING they try to hand you or offer you.
I want to protect him. This world is one big mad house.
As much as my love wants to keep him safe, I don’t see how you can love without truth. So, how do I teach my 10 year old to put his hands up when I never would?
How is it your 10 year old understands the concept of "Rule of Law" vs "Rule by law" and you do not? No, the police can not make up the laws on the spot. Throwing anything at a police officer is illegal. Threats to burn down the school should be investigated. Instead of teaching your child that the justice system is oppressive, perhaps teach him that his words and his actions have consequences, and if he says something that could threaten the health and well being of others, he will be treated as a threat to society. Yes, intervening in an arrest is illegal. And if you do not take the summons he hands you for breaking the law, you will end up in jail. No, cops can not handle the problem however they want, and it is quite inconceivable that any adult would believe this
You seem to think that laws, and their enforcement, is something you can opt out of if you do not agree with them, and that if society disagrees with you, then you are a victim of oppression.
Hopefully, for your child's sake, if a police officer tells him to put his hands up, he will. The fact that you never would is just plain irresponsible, and you may well end up dead as a result of your holding firm to your dangerously irrelevant ideas of what you think you have a right to.
If you want to keep your child safe, teach him that breaking the law has consequences, and that he should, whenever possible, not break the law.
what Hitler did was legal. slavery was legal. it's clear to see how dangerous and destructive ideas spread through masses of people too scared to think the "law" may be wrong..
sorry to see you spent so long typing that nonsense out.
Ah, yes... I see what you are doing here... you are taking the worst examples of human injustice and using them to justify the outrageousness of a school taking steps to keep the children safe from the threat of arson, or suggesting that the 13 cops charged with murder (in 2013) or the 2,500 claims of brutality, out of the 1.5 million arrests (that's 0.0016%) is somehow equivalent to jack booted Nazis marching through streets rounding up Jews. I suspect that teaching 10 year old's that every cop is a potential Nazi will not serve him or her well as they try to make their way in the world.
Sometimes laws have to and should be broken....but its important to know which laws and what context deems their being broken necessary...
Throwing a snowball at a cop? Unnecessary .
btw @amariespeaks .....your amazingly beatiful and lucious red hair stirs up a fire in me as bright as its colour. (just a compliment)
I think that if you want revolution perhaps it is important to teach your son law....it is quite a complex subject and very empowering to he who can navigate its depths.
Too many judges and attorneys / lawers are Freemasons....we need more good natured people in politics , law, and deep government / positions of power to balance the duat.
Best of life to you and your son !
Justification to a old problem was no where near what I was trying to portray in that post. It was meant as a tiny example to highlight overreactions in society. I will need to rethink how to get a blatant point across in my upcoming posts. thank you for the criticism and all your energy that was clearly put in to your reply.
-namaste
I would have thought that as well, but then I started hanging out on Steemit, which, you'll find, is quite the anarchist's playground. It's quite a prevalent idea around here that individuals ought to be able to opt out of laws they don't agree with.
For what it's worth, it's quite nice to have your dissenting voice here. :)
As an illegal alien fugitive hiding out and living under the radar in Argentina for the past 10 years, I consider myself an anarchist as well, but also a realist.
I see a passionate parent expressing the challenges of raising a kid in an increasingly dangerous world. I may not agree with everything, but how do I know exactly what she believes? I wouldn't want to misinterpret or pass judgement on a person based on a few words.
Mans laws are meant to be broken
universal or natural law cannot be.
...maybe you should not protect him....
My dad died when I was four and I was left being raised by my mother who tried to "protect" and shield me from life....
It only ended up making me very confused and full of hatred and Ive been sent to foster homes, been arrested a bunch of times, ended up being homeless and not finishing high school mostly because of this hatred and lack of a father figure....
I am a 20 year old man.
What ive realized through various epiphanies , is that you cannot own a person - they are them and you are you, and you cannot be them.
Therefore, it is my belief that mothers should not protect their sons so much as raise and them to both unlock their fullest potential and be their best selves.
I think we should not hold anything back from our children but instruct them to be wise and teach them everything we know...
The school system only collects souls.....(think about that)
After all, they will be their OWN person one day and make their own decisions....the best we can do as parents is prepare them for the world .
I personally believe that this video resonates with the topic of being a mother raising a son;
#spiritualgangsterism
I totally agree with you. My mom took off when I was 5, she's still a drug addict and a drunk to this day.. 25 years later. My dad is the same but at least he stuck around. I've been through the system myself, too. There's no way to shield a kid from that kind of life when you're raised in it.. It's a hard world out there.
Thank you for sharing your story and the video. The video is awesome. Great points!
It is really important to wake up this next generation to all the injustices in the world and raise humans who are aware and fair.
The school system comment, right on point! seriously makes sense. I've been seeing the same things.
Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. I really appreciate it!
:)
very nice writing, and yes agreed, but before start the revolution, one can go back to live with nature and spend time on steemit away from that "world" ..upvoted n will follow
what wonderful advice! One political post curbs my appetite for a while haha I think I'll go back to writing about empowering posts about growth. However those don't get many views. lol Thank you so much for reading and commenting.
Congrats you have been selected as Author of the day by the Steemvoter (SV) Guild, keep up the good work and helping make Steem great!
Note: You should receive many guild votes in an hour or so, enjoy!
@steemvoter Thank you so much! I'm honored!
So happy to know other people can relate!
great post, i found out about you in @Curie , i was too featured here ( so thats how we solve the mystery) keep up the good work
@filotasriza3 thank you! I'll check out @Curie now, so glad people can relate!
Decent post but overrewarded due to whale swarm voting and I am downvoting it for that reason. I would ask some of the most powerful whales whose accounts are seen voting here to consider not swarming together and as a result concentrating rewards to such a degree when there are many other worthy blog posts that would benefit from reduced concentration.
don't know what that means, but thanks for even taking the time to read my post! peace friend
It means you are caught in the middle of a broader disagreement between voters who have lot of SP. It isn't personal. Peace.
@smooth I hope you won't find this impertinent but I wonder if whales could perhaps have some sort of a "monthly whale's conference/ meeting/ brainstorming " where in you guys could perhaps talk about stuff like these and any improvement / proposals that may do Steemit good but anyway, I just dropped by to ask you to please check your chat I've sent you a reminder regarding the SCC. Thank you very much.
Good post congratulations, follow me and I follow you
Thank you! Been on a bit of a nomadic hiatus but I will certainly follow you :)
@amariespeaks Following you now. Thanks so much!! ✌🏾😊
You're welcome! Followed you as well! Looking forward to reading more of your posts.