I agree that there are many times to argue in my head but not in fact - I don't tend to seek out people I disagree with often because the mental energy it takes to fairly discuss with someone of a completely opposing viewpoint is so massive. I also find that there are very few people really willing to have a rational discussion and it's just discouraging when a conversation instantly devolves into mockery and name-calling.
That is funny how your situation with your debate partner worked out! My husband has a friend in a similar way, where he used to be all the way to one side and now has gone to the other side of him.
Having a bias is unavoidable: you have experiences and have learned from them and they form your bias. The question is...how willing are you to acknowledge your biases and submit them to the truth for analysis?
If you can know your bias and test it's worth, then you are a very truthful person and your arguments have value. ;-)
I don't always no them for sure!
This is going to sound very judgemental but I don't know another way of putting it: Most Danes don't go into mockery and name-calling instantly. Most are able to have decent conversations with people we disagree with. It's something we value very highly and in school we are encouraged to have our own opinions and make valid arguments for them. It's perfectly fine (in most cases) to present a differing view even in an exam situation, as long as you can present good arguments for your view.
You can go ahead and be judgmental: it is definitely a current failing in the United States. Exercising good judgment should be honored, not castigated; sadly, "being judgmental" is definitely one of the current un-politically-correct abilities in our society.
My near family is mostly English, German and Irish. In this culture, we tend to be less the hot-heads and more the ones who will avoid confrontation. We are having to learn how to politely stand firm because otherwise we end up getting run over by people who like to yell and scream and call names rather than have a reasonable argument.
I'm shocked at how difficult it is to find people to have the kind of arguments I'm used to being able to have, where you can present different views without descending into stereotyping, mocking and ignoring the person you're conversing with.
It is sad. I love a good debate, it's often how I grow and figure out what I really believe and why.